For years, I felt that I was too skinny. I resorted to a plan of gaining one pound per month. That plan never worked. Whatever half a pound I gained for the whole year, whenever I got a virus, I would lose several pounds. Needless to say, I felt pretty unattractive in my less-than-100-pound body.

If you feel unattractive, you’re not alone! We all have insecurities, both men and women. However, to begin to truly value the woman that you are, you need truth in your inner being.

Here are 9 tips to overcome when you feel unattractive:

1) Determine the root causes of your feelings of unattractiveness.

Who/what has formed the mindset that you have about yourself? Who played a part in this framing? For me, my insecurities about my body stemmed from insults I received in my adolescence. I still remember one such incident and it was such a long time ago!

If you have no clue, please ask the Holy Spirit to reveal it to you. I believe He will show you.

​2) Cry out to God for His healing.

Perhaps, your feelings of unattractiveness have become so deep-seated that you need God’s supernatural intervention. You need Him to heal you deep within. He wants to do that for you. Just be totally vulnerable with God. He already knows your pain.

3) Search the Scriptures for the truth to counter the lies.

What does the Word of God say about beauty? What does God say about your worth?

One of my absolute favourite verses is …

“Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” Proverbs 31:30

Another is …

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Psalm 139:14

Are you embracing God’s truth about you?

I would further recommend that you research and write down all the verses about your self-worth according to the Word of God and read them aloud daily. Additionally, take one verse or a portion of Scripture per day and meditate (ponder or ruminate) until it moves from head-knowledge to heart-conviction.

​When a woman truly knows Jesus, it changes her inwardly. Watch the power of God work in your mind as it is being renewed with the Word!

4) Take practical steps.

Besides the Word, the Lord is also very practical and He will instruct you to take good care of your body. Believe me, it saddens me that so many Christians have little self-control when it comes to proper diet and exercise.

​Here are some questions to ask yourself:-

• Has the Lord been instructing you to exercise?
• Has He been guiding you to get more sleep?
• What has he been saying to you about your busy lifestyle?
• Does your diet have too much refined sugar?
• Have you been drinking sufficient water?
• When was the last time you enjoyed the outdoors?
• Do you need to see a dietician?

​By being obedient to the Lord in these areas, you will begin to feel better about yourself. Of course, it will also change how you look – glowing skin, a spark in your eyes, better mood, more energy, etc.

​According to research, the following activities release feel-good hormones:

• Exercising
• Cooking
• Listening to music or making music
• Going outside
• Laughter
• Meditating (on God’s Word)
• Playing with your pet
• Getting a good night’s rest
• Managing stress
• Pampering yourself (e.g. getting a massage)

​5) Prioritize becoming like Christ.

Character growth is true lasting beauty!

I’ve come to realize that what makes a woman feel really attractive has little to do with her external appearance at the end of the day. I remember being at a conference and there was an interview with an elderly couple (both probably over 80). The husband was saying that his wife was more beautiful than when they first got married! He looked at her with such tenderness! So, my sister, sit at the “feet” of Jesus and learn of him. Allow Him to transform you inwardly.

​6) Evaluate what you can and cannot change.

​The Serenity Prayer:

“O God and Heavenly Father, grant to us the serenity of mind to accept that which cannot be changed; courage to change that which can be changed, and wisdom to know the one from the other, through Jesus Christ our Lord, Amen.”

​What you cannot (or should not) change:

• The colour of your skin (if you’re into bleaching, throw those damaging products out please!)
• Your height
• Your bone structure

What you can change:

• Your attitude
• Your self-care
• How you spend your time
• What you think on

7) Have a gratitude list.

Celebrate all God has blessed you with!

I may not have a perfect body, but I do have beautiful eyes and a lovely smile. Many years ago, I read about the hormones that are released when a person smiles. So guess what? I started smiling to myself in the mirror! You must try it!

​My challenge to you …

Take a pen/pencil and a sheet of paper and write down all your “assets” in the following area:

• What you like about your body
• What you like about your personality
• What compliments you receive from others
• Which areas you have seen growth in the last few years
• What you are grateful for concerning your health

Write any and everything that comes to your mind.

​Like me, I’m certain you have “flaws” that you wish you didn’t have, but it’s better to place your focus on the “assets” that you do possess.

​8) Be patient with yourself.

Healing and growth to love and accept yourself will not take place overnight. The process may take years. You may feel like you’re back to “square one” at times, but overall, I’m sure you will experience growth in this area. So, be patient with the process.

9) Go on a social media fast.

If you are prone to comparing yourself with the photoshopped & filtered “beauties” on your social media pages, then you may need to:

1. Unfollow some of your celebrity influencers;
2. Unfollow friends and acquaintances;
3. Take a weekly break or even come off of social media for an extended period;
4. Temporarily or permanently deactivate your accounts.

“And if your eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than with two eyes to be thrown into the hell of fire.” Matthew 18:9 ESV

​Although I’m not saying you’ll be going to hell for envying someone else’s beauty, at times, we have to be radical for our own mental health.

​
God has your back!

Summary

Do you feel unattractive? Do you know what has been the cause of it? If you have already overcome in this area, what tips have helped you to feel beautiful in your own skin? Please share in the comments.

To recap,

Here are 9 tips to overcome when you feel unattractive:

• Determine the root causes of your self-hatred or feelings of unattractiveness.
• ​Cry out to God for His healing.
• Search the Scriptures for the truth to counter the lies.
• Take practical steps.
• ​Prioritize becoming like Christ.
• ​Evaluate what you can and cannot change.
• Have a gratitude list.
• Be patient with yourself.
• Go on social media fast.

Thanks for stopping by!

#madeforlove

With love & laughter,

Kimberly Garth

Other Helpful Resources:

10 Signs a Guy is Romantically Interested in You

5 Qualities that Attract a Man to a Woman

What to do When You Like a Guy

Recommended Books:

Secret Keeper: The Delicate Power of Modesty by Dannah Gresh

His Needs, Her Needs Participant’s Guide: Building an Affair-Proof Marriageby Willard F. Jr. Harley

10 Things Every Woman Needs to Know About Men: Understand His Mind And Capture His Heart by by Sabrina Alexis & Eric Charles 

Recommended Reading Device (LOVE IT!):

The post 9 Tips to Overcome When You Feel Unattractive appeared first on Petals Bloom.

With a little extra effort, you can make yourself look great online without having to change who you are or even compromise your biblical values.

Here are 5 tips to make yourself look great online:

1) Have an updated professional photo of yourself.

I know you might like the flattering photo of you that is over 10 years old, but you want to give all the onlookers the true reality of your current look.

For those of you who love being “incognito”, that’s not a good idea if you would like to at least peak the interest of a great guy. A woman (or man for that matter) without a photo will not even be considered … he or she is “invisible”. The guy is probably not even going to look further into your profile unless he knows you outside of the online realm.

Tips for your profile picture:

• Wear colours that make you look and feel absolutely fantastic.
• Select an outfit that makes you look feminine and girlie.
• Show your real face. Stay away from cartoons, a pic of your dog, cat, favourite mountain, etc.
• Your face should frame most of the image. It shouldn’t be too far or too close up.
• Get a professional photographer to take it or a friend who has an eye for such things, but use a good camera.
• Use the same headshot for all your profile pics so across platforms.
• Smile in your profile pic!

2) Use video when possible.

A lot of people prefer to opt out of using video for their conference calls. However, if you wish to widen your prospects of meeting a worthy gentleman, I would advise against it. As a matter of fact, put some effort into your appearance and top it off with a pleasant smile. If you have the opportunity to speak, shine!

Additional Tips:

• Invest in a ring light to give you a soft, flattering look on your videos.
• Take a shower/bath before a zoom call so you feel your best.
• Spray a little perfume to make you feel superb!
• Wear makeup.
• Style your hair to bring out your best features.
• Wear earrings that compliment your complexion and facial structure.
• Wear a top/dress with colours that make you pop!

3) Don’t berate men on social media.

You may have had bad experiences with some men, but there are still lots of good men out there. If you are bitter about men; talk to God; talk to your friends privately; or even see a counselor. However, demeaning men on social media is in poor taste and poor judgment. If you must write to express your emotions, please write in your journal.

As a matter of fact, do the opposite.

Once on a while, compliment a guy in your life …your father, brother, a co-worker, a kind stranger, etc. With so many women who are men-haters and men-bashers, you want to set yourself a part to be a woman who loves, appreciates and respects men.

4) Don’t berate your former boyfriend on social media.

If you think your former boyfriend is a “low-life“, the whole world does not need to know your opinion about him. It shows to the world that you have some unresolved issues which is normal, but posting about it in social media is still not the best avenue. While you may garner some sympathy from friends (especially other women), you will ward off a good man too. He doesn’t know the history, but from your venting, it clearly shows to the world that you have some baggage. A sensible man will be thinking, “If she destroys another man’s reputation like that, she may do the same to me if we have a disagreement.”

5) Only share modest photos and videos of yourself.

Modesty shows a woman’s humility; a sensitivity, understanding and love toward men who are easily turned on visually; it shows that a woman cherishes her worth; it shows that a woman is wise in wanting to remain mysterious; and she wants to ensure that her husband feels special. Most importantly, it shows that she honours God!

So ladies, cover all of your private parts in your photos and videos. If you wear a bikini when you use your private pool, pleassseee keep those photos private. The world does not need to see your exposed breasts and all your legs. You will have a better chance of attracting Mr. Right by presenting your Best and NOT your Breasts. lol

Bonus

Advice on facial expressions & online interactions.

• Smile often.
• Be attentive on video calls.
• Minimize frowning.
• Limit being argumentative on posts or on video calls.
• Sit up straight and don’t slouch.

Summary

Is your online presence aligned to your profession of faith in Jesus Christ? What impressions of your character will a godly man get from your online presence? What changes can you make to improve your digital persona?

To recap,

Here are 5 tips to make yourself look great online:

• Have an updated professional photo of yourself.
• Use video when possible.
• Don’t berate men on social media.
• Don’t berate your former boyfriend on social media.
• Only share modest photos and videos of yourself.

Thanks for stopping by!

#madeforlove

With love & laughter,

Kimberly Garth

Other Helpful Resources:

10 Practical Ways to Improve Your Chances of Meeting the One

8 Essential Measures to Safeguard Yourself With Online Dating

When The Guy You Like is a Foreigner | 6 Sober Insights

14 Proven Tips for a Successful Long Distance Relationship

Recommended Books:

Feminine Appeal: Seven Virtues of a Godly Wife and Mother” by Carolyn Mahaney

Quest for Love: True Stories of Passion and Purity by Elisabeth Elliot

Choosing God’s Best: Wisdom for Lifelong Romance by Dr. Don Raunikar

Recommended Reading Device (LOVE IT!):

The post 5 Tips To Make Yourself Look Great Online appeared first on Petals Bloom.

Those are all great.  However, when this year comes to an end, you want to know that you’ve grown in some other areas as well. 

Here are 14 epic New Year’s resolutions for a better you for this new year:

1) Set aside “think” time.

My husband finds it strange that I can just sit and stare.  I’m usually doing some serious thinking and I love it!

Here are some reasons to have regular “think” times:

• Gain clarity on issues; 
• Solve a problem:
• Meditate on God’s Word and determine how it should be applied to your life.
• Help you to be still and know that He is God.
• Listen to God;
• Allow God to get your attention; and 
• Provide room to design your future plans for any area of your life.

2) Forgive yourself and others.

When you look back at last year, you might have made some poor decisions that now make you cringe with regret.  You said words that should have never left your mouth.  Perhaps, you’ve hurt others or even yourself by your inability to break an addiction.  With a new year before you, it’s time to forgive yourself.

Additionally, are you holding onto hurt? Is there someone that you need to forgive? Refusing to forgive someone will do more harm to you and your fellowship with God than to the other person(s).  If you’re having difficulty, ask the Holy Spirit to help You.  He’s always willing.

3) Choose true repentance.

Forgiveness and repentance go hand in hand.  If you are truly sorry for an action, then you need to make changes to have a different outcome the next time a similar situation arises.  You cannot keep thinking the same way, making the same decisions and hope for a different outcome. True repentance involves a change in attitude which would then cause a change in action. 

“Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.” 2 Corinthians 7:10 NIV

4) See a Christian counselor.

Whether you think you need one right now or not, it’s good to have at least one appointment yearly with a biblically-grounded counselor.  Most of us are not aware of the destructive effects of disappointments, careless words, fears, trauma and the like have on our souls.  As such, it is important to see a professional counselor who can bring light to the dark hidden areas of our lives.  

I saw one last year and it was great.  To be honest, before my appointment, I thought… “what will I talk about with her?”  Then the Lord brought to my mind a fear that was plaguing me for months! I’m so grateful that she helped me gain clarity and freedom from that fear.  From then on, I decided that seeing her would be an annual tradition.

5) Write a short journal entry every day.

I cannot discount how emotionally healthy this practice is.  If you’re an emotional mess, than you need to start journal. If you don’t want to end up in an emotional wreck, then start journaling to prevent it.

Related article:

10 Easy Tips to Start Journaling today

6) Start an emergency fund.

As a single woman, you may not have anyone to rely on financially (except Jesus) when an emergency arises.  About two years ago, I realized that I had no emergency fund.  

I thought it was a worthwhile goal, so I made sacrifices and implemented measures to build an emergency fund for myself.  Within a few months, I had reached my goal. 

Make a plan to store up an emergency fund for a rainy day.  You can initially save for your total monthly expenses for three months and when that target is achieved, you can aim for six months of expenses.  Check out www.daveramsey.com for tips.

7) Plan a weekly social media and smartphone fast.

You may not realize that you are a social media or smartphone addict until there is no internet; your devices are unavailable to you; or you decide to do a fast.  As a Christian, you should not allow anything or anyone else to control you …even if it seems harmless.  Believe me, it’s very freeing!

In order to give social media and your devices their proper subservient position in your life, you need to be intentional or they will overtake your life. 

Tips for social media/smartphone boundaries:

• Choose a day when you will not use your phone for a specified time (like 6am-6pm). I like Sundays for that.
• Only check your emails/messages/comments (and the list goes on) every … hour(s).
• Remove all notifications so that you will not be tempted to look and respond.

The more you do it, the easier it gets.  

8) Ask God for the opportunity to share the gospel with others.

When your favorite store is having a sale, it’s natural to tell others.  If something incredible happens to you, you’ll be bursting to share it with others.  This is natural because it completes your cycle of joy. 

In the same way, as a follower of Jesus whose life has been transformed by His power, your joy will be made complete when you share Him with others.  It’s not that you are trying to earn His favour, but it will add a dimension of joy to your life that you may not have been experiencing before.

9) Disciple other women.

I have disciplined over one hundred women and without a doubt, the young ladies who have grown the most were the ones who helped others grow.  If you want to grow in your relationship with God, help others to grow also. Please note that discipleship is not equivalent to mentorship or coaching. 

Discipleship involves teaching others what you have learnt while sharing your life with them in an authentic way.  It involves being transparent and vulnerable with others so that they can also grow.

As one of my disciplers said to me, “if you keep on taking in and not give back to others, you will become spiritually constipated.”

“…In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ ” Acts 20:35 NIV

Check out helpful resources at www.cru.org and www.navigators.org.  There is no need to reinvent the wheel.

10) Evaluate your key relationships and have a plan to invest in them.

At the end of most people’s lives, there is one common thread. They often wish that they had spent more time with loved ones.  While you possibly have more years ahead of you, take their advice and see what you can do in this new year to have better relationships with your loved ones.

Tips:

• Schedule dates with your parents (or guardians), siblings, nephews, nieces, etc.
• Write little notes throughout the year expressing gratitude, what you admire, a special memory, etc. to important people in your life.
• Make yourself available to celebrate key events in their lives.
• Attend family gatherings.
• Choose a few older relatives that you’ll visit this year.

11) Seek help to break an addictive habit.

Be determined that you’ll be free this year from whatever habit that has kept you as a slave.  The main thing that often keeps people bond to addiction is secrecy. Think about a trustworthy friend and confide in that person.  I would suggest another female.  

Ask her to pray and hold you accountable.  Together, you can research, chart a course of freedom and enroll third party help like Covenant Eyes.  Freedom is totally worth the courage it will take to be transparent with someone else.

“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.” James 5:16 NIV

Related articles:

How to Beat Porn Addiction and Other Sexually Addictive Behaviors | 10 Practical Tips

12) Surrender your life completely to God.

It’s really interesting that so many Christians are sincerely afraid of God’s will for their lives.  If you surrender the area of romantic relationships to God, you think that God will choose the most ugly boring man for your spouse.  If you surrender your career to God, He’ll send you to the most desolate regions of the world where you would be on the brink of starvation.  

From where does every good and perfect gift comes? It comes from God (James 1:17).  Who created all that is this universe with such intricacy, beauty and intelligence? God did (Genesis 1:1)! Who gives us all good things to enjoy? God does (1 Timothy 6:17).

The enemy has deceived us into thinking that God is not good and that He’s a killjoy.  Nothing could be further from the truth. A life of surrender will cause you to live your best life now.  Anything but a surrendered life means that you’re leading your own life. The leading of a fallen human being (you) cannot measure up to the leading of the  Almighty God. 

It’s time to experience true freedom and adventure by surrendering completely to Him.

13) End any unhealthy romantic relationships. 

You’ve wasted enough time on him.  Time to end it and move on. Whether it’s a boyfriend, live-partner, or situationship, make a clean break in this coming year.  It’ll be hard at first, but it will get easier.  God has much better in store for you.  

Related articles:

6 Guys to Resist

Are you in an Unhealthy Relationship? 8 Signs

“Situationship” or Relationship … 5 Reasons It Should be Clear

14) Take a weekly sabbath.

Once a week, take time to take it easy and rest.  If God rested, you can rest too. While you’re resting, He can take care of things.

Summary

New Year’s resolutions are not meant to control you but help you to make necessary changes in your life.  It’s an opportunity for a fresh beginning. One year, I resolved to read 24 books. When I accomplished it, I grew because I read books that changed me.  All that reading has probably impacted this blog. 

Here are the 14 epic New Year’s resolutions for a better you this year:

1. Set aside “think” time.
2. Forgive yourself and others.
3. Choose true repentance.
4. See a Christian counselor.
5. Write a short journal entry every day.
6. Start an emergency fund.
7. Plan a weekly social media and smartphone fast.
8. Ask God for the opportunity to share the gospel with others.
9. Disciple other women.
10. Evaluate your key relationships and have a plan to invest in them.
11. Seek help to break an addictive habit.
12. Surrender your life completely to God.
13. End any unhealthy romantic relationships. 
14. Take a weekly sabbath.

What are your New Year’s resolutions for this year?  What changes or developmental goals do you have this year? Please share by commenting below.

If you’d like to get weekly email tips to help you grow personally and relationally, subscribe and you’ll also receive your free “Emotional Maturity versus Emotional Maturity Checklist.” Thanks for stopping by!

#madetolove

Like, share & subscribe!

With love,

Kimberly 

Recommended books:

“Disciplines of The Beautiful Woman” by Anne Ortlund

“The Master Plan of Evangelism” by Robert E. Coleman

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Firstly, let’s look at what you may try to add to your daily routine. Here are the possible average times for some activities on a typical day of the week:

• Time with God = 1 hour
• Work = 8 hours
• Sleep = 8 hours 
• Cooking = 2 hours 
• Eating = 3 hours (unrushed breakfast, lunch and dinner)
• Classes and studies for career enhancement = 5 hours (3 hours for classes)
• Time with loved ones = 2 hours
• Entertainment (YouTube, Netflix series, etc.) = 2 hours 
• Exercise = 30 minutes 
• Household chores (like washing dishes) = 30 minutes 
• Mental-development (like reading, watching news, etc.) = 1 hour 
• Reflection & journaling = 30 minutes 
• Church involvement (prayer meeting, Bible study, etc.) = 2 hours 
• Commute time = 2 hours 

TOTAL time needed: 37.5 hours daily!!!

Wow! You have a challenge because you have only 24 hours per day.

Realistically, not all of the above activities occur everyday. For instance, you may attend classes twice per week totalling 10 hours and prayer meetings are generally one day weekly.

But the fact remains that too many of us have over-packed schedules.

Consequences when you’re over-extended for a prolonged period of time:

• Burnout; (Read “9 Tips to Prevent Burnout”)
• Key relationships become distant;
• Relationship with God becomes cold;
• Your health begins to deteriorate;
• Life loses its appeal; and 
• Lots more…

Therefore, you need to find ways to effectively achieve a realistic work-life balance. It is possible, but it will require being radical and disciplined. But at the end of the day, it’s your decision the kind of life that you want.

Here are ten ways to realistically achieve work-life balance:

1) Decide your priorities.

You may have “a million and one” goals in life. However, with a limited amount of time, you need to set your priorities.

In his book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change”, Stephen Covey suggests dividing your activities into the following four quadrants (see diagram):

• Q1: Urgent and Important
• Q2: Not urgent and important 
• Q3: Not Important but urgent 
• Q4: Not urgent and not important 

He suggests that you focus most of your time in quadrants 1 and 2 but particularly quadrant 2 because this quadrant involves activities that are proactive and preventative. When you prioritize activities that will ultimately help you to succeed in life, you’ll spend less time in crises, outing fires and wasting time.

2) Use a schedule to plan your life.

A key ingredient to effectively achieving a work-life balance is having a reasonable schedule to guide your life. You don’t need a rigid schedule that accounts for every single minute of the day. Life is not predictable and you’ll only be stressed out if your schedule is inflexible and has no breathing space.

Benefits of a written schedule:

• You’ll know when to say “yes” and when to say “no”.
• Your day can be better guided with knowledge and order.
• Writing a plan has the power to make you more likely to remember your commitments.
• You’ll be able to see if you’re being unrealistic with your time.
• At a glance, you can determine where you can be flexible when unforeseen circumstances arise.

Tips:

• Make it adjustable because changes are inevitable. If you’re writing a hard copy, I’d recommend using a pencil. 
• I read in a book that if you estimate that a task will take 30 minutes, multiply by three and assign 90 minutes to the task. Or better yet, record the task time over a period of time. 
• Slot in breaks.
• Don’t forget to make allowance for commute times.

3) Simplicity is key.

God knows that 24 hours is sufficient for each of us to accomplish what He wants us to do daily. If you are constantly stretched, then you may need to further simplify your life. Spend some time with Him to be guided about your priorities in this season of your life. 

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; [6] In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6

You may need to live contrary to the norm. Do less and intentionally own less. The more you own and the more time commitments you have, the less time or capacity you will have to realistically achieve work-life balance.

4) Find ways to get more from your time.

Since you cannot get more time, you need to make the most of the time that you do have.

Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. Ephesians 5:15-17

Here are some suggestions:

• Find and eliminate time wasters. Try to record your activities and their associated times over a week to see where your time is actually going.
• Don’t respond to every message and email immediately. Batch your responses by scheduling appointed times for responding. You might actually accomplish more when you’re less interrupted by intrusive notifications and a compulsion to respond to everyone immediately.
• Try to use “down” time effectively. For instance, for a long commute, you can use the time to think and reflect; listen to self-development podcast; listen to a book; or listen to the Bible.
• Avoid multitasking and give full attention to the task as hand. You’ll probably finish it faster and better. Check out this eye-opening book “Switch on Your Brain: The Key to Peak Happiness, Thinking and Health” by Dr. Carolyn Leaf.

5) Invest in time-saving tools for your trade.

I got a flat tire on a Sunday morning on my way to church. We stopped at a tire repair place. Within five minutes, the tire was removed, repaired, re-installed and the four remaining tires (including the spare) were filled with air. I was so impressed with their level of efficiency. The main reason is that they invested in good equipment that made the job fast and easy. Good tools make work lighter and saves time.

For instance, if your work requires a considerable amount of computer work, you need a computer with quick processing time. Otherwise, a two-minute task can cost you two hours.

6) Set workable daily goals.

You need to have an ongoing list of tasks to do. Each day, select the tasks to be worked on for that day. Be careful that you don’t add to your daily list more than you can chew or you might feel like a continual failure. When you’re reasonable with your goals and most of your tasks are being accomplished daily, you’ll feel a sense of victory. 

Tips:

• Divide your tasks into high, medium and low importance.
• Devote your best time to your “high importance” priorities. If you have more energy in the morning, use those key hours to accomplish your most challenging mental tasks.
• Divide large, seemingly insurmountable tasks into smaller, less intimidating tasks.

7) Make time to refresh and reward yourself.

You need to set aside unhurried time for having fun and simply relaxing. If you’re always on the go and you don’t set aside time for being refreshed, you’ll eventually realize that you have no real life. 

Tips:

• Set aside one evening weekly to do an activity that you enjoy.
• Reward yourself in a way that’s meaningful to you.
• Intentionally unplug from technology every day to make time for you.
• Plan to have one day weekly to rest from all forms of work.
• Take an annual vacation, even if it means staying within your country.

8) Learn to say “no” to others and to yourself.

There are times to say “yes” and there are times to say “no”. Don’t let guilt cause you to continually over-extend yourself. Sacrificing sleep and rest to serve others or achieving a worthwhile goal may happen from time to time, but those periods cannot last indefinitely. Otherwise, you’ll be heading for burnout (read “9 Tips to Prevent Burnout”). We must remember that God has wisely placed limitations on us as human beings for a reason. Neither you nor I are gods. 

People might be upset with your boundaries, but they’ll get over it … eventually.

You also need to say “no” to yourself when you’re tempted to waste time or commit to another activity for which you have no time.

9) Don’t procrastinate.

In your schedule, ensure that you devote sufficient time to your most important priorities whether you’re in the mood or not. Commit yourself to the task. If you lack motivation, pray and ask God to help you. If you allow feelings to control you, you will never reach your full potential. One of my teachers would always say, “procrastination is the thief of time.”

10) Know when it’s time to move on.

I’m not a quitter, but I also believe that you cannot allow your employer (or any human authority) to “kill” you , slowly but surely. It might be better to get a lower-paying job and downsize your life than to sacrifice your health and your key relationships. Be self-aware and know what your job is doing to you, even if you love it.

Now godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and harmful lusts which drown men in destruction and perdition. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, for which some have strayed from the faith in their greediness, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. 1 Timothy 6:6-10

Questions to consider:

• Would you be content with “food and clothing”? 
• What price are you willing to pay for career success?

Related articles:

9 Tips to Prevent Burnout

The One Thing That All Successful People Have in Common

10 Life-Changing Reasons to Begin Journaling NOW

10 Easy Tips to Start Journaling today

Summary 

You want your work to flourish but not at the expense of your personal life. Hence, realistically achieving work-life balance becomes an important conversation that must be had. Some ways for achieving that balance are deciding your priorities; using a schedule; simplifying your life; investing in time-saving tools; setting reasonable goals; making time to refresh and reward yourself; learning to say “no”; resisting procrastination; and knowing when to move on.

What other ways have you found to be helpful in achieving work-life balance? Is it even a possibility? Please add to the conversation by adding your comments below. I mentioned being self-aware in the last point and my “Know Yourself” questionnaire will assist with that. When you subscribe, you’ll receive the questionnaire in your inbox. As a subscriber, you’ll also hear more about my life and receive weekly tips about successfully living this life as a follower of Jesus Christ. Thanks for stopping by!

Made to love!:)

Like, Share & Subscribe!

With love,

Kimberly

Recommended Books:

“The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change” by Stephen Covey

“The Slight Edge: Turning Simple Disciplines into Massive Success and Happiness” by Jeff Olson 

“Switch on Your Brain: The Key to Peak Happiness, Thinking and Health” by Dr. Carolyn Leaf

“Petals Bloom is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.”

The post 10 Ways to Realistically Achieve Work-Life Balance appeared first on Petals Bloom.

You have more things to do than hours in the day to do them. Sometimes, you wish that the day contained about 36 hours rather than a mere 24 hours. There’s so much to do with so little time in which to accomplish them. 

Weekends are just as cramped with activity…grocery shopping, cleaning, cooking, socializing, volunteerism, events and church activities. When someone asks you how you’re doing, you willingly divulge all the things that currently occupy your time. You want them to know that you’re a productive woman.

My life was brimming with activity. More work opportunities came knocking on my door because I got things done. I loved being busy because it made me feel significant. But it came at a price.

Then one day, I got very ill with a virus. My resistance became extremely low. My body couldn’t shake the virus and I would suffer a relapse once I began working again. I was burnt out and I didn’t even see it coming. Consequently, I had to take a prolonged leave of absence to give my body a much-needed rest. In order to prevent a second burnout, I had to make several lifestyle changes.

Ladies, here are nine tips to prevent burnout in your life:

1) Devalue busyness.

I once heard the phrase, “Jesus was never in a hurry.” Incidentally, that never crossed my mind before. For the most part, I was always in a hurry impacting lives for Jesus. The compliments and praises were like drugs propelling me to do more. Plus, I love the thrill of accomplishing every task. 

If someone had told me that my real significance was in my work, I would have denied it. I sincerely thought it was in Christ. But the strange thing is that I was so busy achieving that I neglected my relationship with Jesus.

Signs that you’re always in a hurry:

• You usually eat and “run” with little time to sit and enjoy a meal.
• Spending extended quality time with God is rare. 
• Your mind is always racing and preoccupied with all that needs to be done.
• When people are talking with you, you zone out. You believe that you’re paying attention, but everyone knows that you haven’t heard much of what they have said.
• It takes a while for your mind to settle down before you fall asleep. As a result, your sleep is not restful. 
• You wake up feeling tired.
• You walk quickly all the time.

Ladies, you need to slow down and enjoy the simple pleasures of life. If you don’t, you’ll miss out on the real joy of living. Besides, you may end up with some serious health issues; lose your desire to know and follow Jesus; and damage other key relationships in your life.

2) Establish margins.

Have you ever noticed that a ruled page has margins at the top, bottom and both sides? If your writing extends to all the margins, your notes tend to look cluttered, unattractive and confusing. Also, if someone handed you an article where every inch of space is occupied with writing, graphics and pictures, you probably would not be drawn to read it. It needs white space to be inviting. 

The same is true for every area of your life. You also need margins and white spaces for an orderly sane life. If your schedule is too packed, you need time margins. This means that you should not have an activity for every waking moment of your day.

When your expenditure is more than your income, you need financial margins if you don’t intend to be stressed. If a marginless life goes unchecked, burnout will be knocking at your door. Check out the book “Margin: Restoring Emotional, Physical, Financial, and Time Reserves to Overloaded Lives” by Richard Swenson.

3) Set aside one day of rest weekly.

In the Old Testament, it is written that God rested on the seventh day. 

By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. And God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done. Genesis 2:2-3 

If God is all powerful and doesn’t need any physical rest, then why did He do it? Besides the theological implications concerning Christ, I believe He wanted to establish a principle of rest and dependence on Him. When we decide to set aside one day weekly to rest, we are saying that:

• We are limited humans;
• We need to depend on God to accomplish all that we are unable to do for ourselves; and
• We recognise our need to be refreshed and re-energized by Him.

Suggestions:

• Choose a day of the week to rest.
• Don’t do any errands or chores on that day.
• Make all the necessary preparations on the days leading up to it.
• Select activities that would revive you – spiritually, emotionally, intellectually and physically.

For instance, I cook on Saturdays to ensure that I have absolutely no cooking to do on Sundays. When I return from church on Sundays at midday, I eat; relax; take a nap; and do some reading. I also try to refrain from using the cell phone and internet until 6pm. 

Try it and let me know if you feel better prepared to face the week in front of you. When you wake up on Monday morning, you should feel rested and equipped to tackle the week ahead. Give yourself a weekly rest of an entire day and you will be able to prevent burnout.

4) Sleep more.

I was watching the evening news some years ago. During the health watch segment, I heard that if a person sleeps for eight hours regularly, she will be less susceptible to contracting viruses. At that time, I would catch nearly every virus that was circulating. So I decided to try it. Would you believe that years passed before I caught another virus? That advice worked wonders!

Other benefits of restful sleep:

• Helps reduce stress.
• Enhances your ability to remember.
• Increases your brain capacity to be more effective and productive.
• Strengthens your body against diseases.
• Prevents heart attacks.
• Improves your mood.

Tips:

Train yourself to go to bed at a decent hour so that your body will get up naturally without an alarm clock.

Bonus: If you have a regular sleep routine, it places less stress on your body and keeps you looking younger longer. Which woman wouldn’t want that benefit?:). Sleep more hours and you’ll be more equipped to prevent burnout.

5) Simplify your life.

The more you have, the more time and money it requires to maintain. When I was living in my parents’ house, my main responsibility was my room although I also had house chores. Now that I live in my own home, the work is never done! That’s just the reality of owning more.

But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. 1 Timothy 6:6-10 

I wonder why a message of “godliness with contentment” has lost its significance these days. We, as Christians, have become unhealthily preoccupied with acquiring and accumulating that we are no longer content with a simple life.

In our focus on getting rich, we lose our health, our families, our values and our faith. In essence, we have “pierced ourselves with many griefs” for things and accolades that will be buried with us in our graves.

It is very tempting to live a life in competition with your neighbors, colleagues, friends and relatives, but it is worth it at the end of the day? In your acquisition of wealth, what price are you willing to pay? When you lay on your dying bed, would you be happy or filled with regret?

I visited one of my friends some years ago and her parents owned a huge property with a beautiful home. In their old age, they were going to move into a small cottage about a quarter the size of their home. Interestingly, we all will have to downsize eventually …into a coffin or an urn.

Questions to consider:

• Do you need to downsize?
• Is your house cluttered?
• Do you have clothes that you’ve bought months or years ago that you have not worn at all or worn only once?
• Are you heading to “ruin and destruction?

Ladies, simplify your life so that you can have more time for others and not things. You’ll have more time and energy to spend time with Jesus and invest in key relationships in your life. 

Have you noticed the new trend of “tiny homes”. These homeowners have realized that a simpler life affords them more freedom, more adventure and less stress. Also, you’ll prevent burnout when you live in simplicity.

6) Say “no” to good things.

“Good is the enemy of the best.” You can fill your life with lots of good things to the detriment of what is best. You need to sit quietly before God and prayerfully determine what are the best investments of your time. Which season are you currently in? How should you be using your time?

You only have twenty-hours in a day and you cannot afford to waste it on “good” things. Many of us have a problem saying “no”, but having your own plan beforehand will help you to say “no” when you should. I once heard, “if you don’t have a plan for your life, someone else will.” So please have a plan for your own life. 

By saying “no” to good but unnecessary opportunities, you will be able to protect yourself from being overburdened by too much activity that will only zap you of all your energy and your purpose. It will help prevent burnout.

7) Focus on your most important relationships.

We have an enemy of our souls and he doesn’t care about you. He will deceive you into believing that your real worth is in your career advancement, your popularity, your ministry, your beauty, your talents, your wealth, and the like. Prosperity (even in ministry) can often cause us to lose focus on our relationship with God.

Be careful that you do not forget the Lord your God, failing to observe his commands, his laws and his decrees that I am giving you this day. Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and all you have is multiplied, then your heart will become proud and you will forget the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. Deuteronomy 8:11-14

You need to always take time to periodically stop and evaluate who and what has your heart. Time is man’s greatest treasure because it is the rarest. Once time is lost, it is lost forever. You can lose money and earn it again, but that will never happen with time. 

Questions to consider:

• If God is your greatest treasure, can you go for long periods of time without connecting with Him?
• Do you carve out time to spend with your loved ones?
• Is it a chore and an unwelcome inconvenience to spend time with God?
• Do you miss spending time with God?

God Himself fuels our lives. In the absence of consistently connecting with Him, we run the risk of slowly but surely damaging our lives.

As a result, we will lose focus; make poor choices; lose our excitement about following Jesus; become deceived and so much more. As a result, a full and meaningless life will escape us. To prevent burnout, we need an ongoing real connection with Jesus and make time for our family and close friends.

8) Enjoy your hobbies.

“All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” God is not a killjoy, but He’s the one who has made us with the capacity to laugh, smile, compete, and seek adventure. 

Set aside time weekly to do something that breathes life into you. I get excited just thinking about having an extended time to sit and read. If it’s outdoors, that’s like icing on a cake for me! 

What hobby refreshes you? Do you need to visit a lake, the mountains or the beach more frequently?

Regularly carve out time for at least one hobby every week and it’ll help to prevent burnout. 

9) Set aside time to think.

“Think” time is not a waste of time! I heard an interview with Nelson Mandela about his time in prison. I never would have expected him to say that in prison, he got time to think and that changed his life. 

One of my favorite things to do is to just sit and think in absolute silence. This sort of disconnection from all distractions is very therapeutic. It will help to calm you; solve problems; improve your creativity; be in tune to your emotions; and discern what God is saying to you.

Tips:

• Place your phone and other devices far away from you…preferably in another room.
• Turn off all notifications on your devices so that you will not feel tempted to look.
• Try to be in a place where you can be physically alone.
• Sit in silence, enjoy your solitude and think. 
• Start with a short amount of time if it’s uncomfortable for you at first.

Think time will refresh you and help prevent burnout.

Related articles:

10 Easy Tips to Start Journaling today 

10 Life-Changing Reasons to Begin Journaling NOW

Doing This Changed My Life

The One Thing That All Successful People Have in Common 

Summary 

Everybody seems to be in a “rat race” today. If a person is busy, she is considered to be productive. However, busyness and productivity are not one and the same. Before you reach the point of burnout, you can make decisions and take precautions that would prevent burnout. 

These nine precautionary measures will help you to prevent burnout- devalue busyness; set aside one day weekly for rest; establish margins; get sufficient sleep; simplify your life; say “no” to good things; focus on your most important relationships; enjoy your hobbies; and finally, set aside ‘think’ time.

When I experienced burnout, my co-worker recommended the book “The Overload Syndrome: Learning to Live Within Your Limits” by Richard Swenson. It was so enlightening that I bought and read his other book called “Margin: Restoring Emotional, Physical, Financial, and Time Reserves to Overloaded Lives.”

Have you ever experienced burnout? What are you currently doing to prevent burnout in your life? Please comment below.

If you’d like to receive more tips to help you to grow in your relationship with God and others, click subscribe and you’ll receive my weekly emails. In addition to my weekly tips, you’ll also get your free “Know Yourself” questionnaire. I love hearing from my subscribes, so feel free to email me. 

Thanks for dropping by!

Made to love!

Like, subscribe & share!

With love,

Kimberly 

Recommended Books:

“The Overload Syndrome: Learning to Live Within Your Limits” by Richard Swenson

“Margin: Restoring Emotional, Physical, Financial, and Time Reserves to Overloaded Lives” by Richard Swenson

“Petals Bloom is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.”

The post 9 Tips to Prevent Burnout appeared first on Petals Bloom.

Choose the personality that best describes you:

(A) ‘Live Lavishly Lorie’

You’d rather pay any sum of money to be pampered by a beautician. It’s a time to relax, de-stress and tell the beautician all your problems (or listen to hers). Your salon visits are absolutely therapeutic and an essential part of your self-care.

(B) ‘Miserly Mary’

You’d rather do your own beauty treatments because you’ll save money in the long-term. For you, you have the money but the expense is certainly not worth it. You’d rather save money by doing your own regimens. You could easily find a million and one other uses for that money.

(C) ‘Perfectionist Penny’

You have a tendency to scrutinize every nail, every hair strand, and every inch of your skin during and after every visit to the various beauticians. You’re usually not satisfied. You think, ‘if I had done my own hair or nails or feet, I would have done a better job.  Drive-others-crazy perfectionist is an apt description for you!

(D) ‘Bare-Bones Budget Betty’

The budget is limited these days. You really cannot afford the exorbitant prices beauticians charge. However, you still want to look your best, so you need to find a way to do your own regimens. As a result, you spend hours watching YouTube’s free tutorials to teach yourself the tips and tricks of beauty regimens.

(E) ‘Gifted Gina’

You love tapping into your creative side by doing your own hair, nails, facials, and the like. You devote several hours per week to give yourself some self-love. For you, this is no chore. You actually look forward to beautifying yourself. You could even start your own YouTube channel!

To which one or ones can you relate best? I’m a combination of ‘Miserly Mary’, ‘Perfectionist Penny’, ‘Bare-Bones Budget Betty’ and ‘Gifted Gina’. Now you can understand why I’m a true do-it-yourself woman.

The Right Tools

Like in any trade, a serious tradesman (or woman) invests in the right tools to make the job easy, quick and even fun.  Beauty treatments are no different. As such, I love investing in beauty tools that are essential to my beauty routines.

Here are eight essential tools for the Do-It-Yourself woman (like me!):

Beauty Tool 1: An electronic heat cap

My mother introduced this tool to me when I was a teenager. It has become one of my favorite beauty tools. I wash my hair weekly and use a heat cap. I recommend the Milliard Professional Hair Conditioning Heat Cap.

Benefits of using Milliard Professional Heat Cap:

• It moisturizes your hair and scalp. If your hair is prone to dryness like curly or kinky hair types, then is an essential tool for you.
• It rejuvenates damaged hair, especially damage due to chemical processing, environmental damage (like from the sun), heat damage (from flat irons), hair bleaching, and hair dyeing.
• It helps your deep conditioner to be absorbed and therefore, conditioner the hair.

How to use an electronic heat cap:

1) Wash the hair with shampoo or a conditioner (co-wash) if that suits you.

2) Apply a deep conditioner (a store-bought conditioner or a homemade one).

3) Cover your hair completely with a plastic bag or shower cap.

4) Plug in your heat cap and choose a temperature that you can tolerate.

5) Use plastic ear protection covers or toilet paper or tissue to protect your ears from the heat.

6) Set your timer for 30 minutes (or according to the product instructions).

7) Read a good book that will develop you. Your body, mind and soul can be nurtured at the same time.

8) After the 30 minutes (or another specified time) expires, remove the heat cap. However, I always unplug it but leave on the heat cap until it cools completely.

9) Rinse out the deep conditioner with warm water and then rinse with cool water.

If you do this weekly, your hair will become healthier. Healthy hair always adds to a woman’s beauty.

Beauty Tool 2: Clarisonic Mia cleansing brush

Our faces tend to attract dirt and it needs to be cleaned deeply. For those of you who wear makeup regularly, this will also help to remove your makeup completely.

Benefits of using a Clarisonic Mia cleansing brush:

• It gently removes impurities like dirt and makeup.
• The brush cleans better than your hands would.
• It prepares the skin for the absorption of your overnight creams, moisturizers or serums.
• Its water-proof structure is great.
• With one charge, you have one hundred minutes of use. If you use it nightly (like myself), then your Clarisonic Mia would give you over 3 months of use on a single charge.

How to use your Clarisonic Mia cleansing brush:

1) Wet your face.

2) Apply your cleanser. I would recommended a cream cleaner for this process because a light foam cleanser will be splashing all over the place. I’ve tried it. I use Aveeno Positively Radiant Brightening Cleanser with my Clarisonic Mia.

3) Follow the instruction manual. The face is divided into 4 areas and you move from one area to the next when you hear a specific signal from the device.

4) Rinse your face well to remove the cleanser.

5) Place your Clarisonic in a place where the brush bristles can dry properly.you don’t want to add bacteria to your regimen.

You just cannot go wrong with this deep pore cleansing brush. I’ve had mine for over two years and it has proven to be a good investment for my skin. I have even used it on my back, shoulders and upper arms.

Beauty Tool 3: Scalp Massaging Shampoo Brush

When I massage my scalp with my shampoo brush, my scalp feels so tingly and oh so clean. In the near future, I will be upgrading to the Vitagoods scalp massaging brush.

Benefits of using Vitagoods Scalp Massaging Shampoo Brush:

• It releases the dirt and impurities (even dandruff) on your scalp better than your fingers.
• It removes the product buildup from your scalp which can make your scalp itchy.
• The massage itself is therapeutic. Your scalp will feel clean and tingly.
• It relaxes you. When you feel stressed, you can try massaging your scalp without the wash routine.
• It exfoliates your scalp and removes dead skin cells.
• It may even aid in growing and thickening your hair.

How to use your Scalp Massaging Shampoo Brush:

1) Apply water to your entire hair.

2) Apply shampoo and lather gently without knotting your hair.

3) If you have tight curls or kinky curly hair, you need to add another step like placing your hair into small braids. Otherwise, you can add up with a knotty mess. That has happened to me!

4) Use your shampoo brush throughout your hair, section by section until your entire scalp has been massaged.

5) Rinse the shampoo thoroughly from your hair.

Beauty Tool 4: Facial Steamer

A professional aesthetician always applies steam to your face. You can steam your own face regularly by investing in a Zenpy Nano Ionic Facial Steamer.

Benefits of using a Zenpy Nano Ionic Facial Steamer:

• It moisturises your skin gets.
• Your pores become opened to purge your skin from dirt, makeup and other impurities.
• It helps to combat acne.
• As an added bonus, it can clear your blocked nasal passage.
• It helps to reduce stress by relaxing you.

How to use a facial steamer:

1) Cleanse your face.

2) Add filtered or distilled water to the steamer.

3) Turn on and steam your face.

4) At this point, you can apply a facial mask and continue the remaining steps of your facial routine.

Beauty Tool 5: Electric shaver

If you’re not one of those hairless ladies, you probably go through the extra beauty step of shaving your legs, armpits and bikini areas. For the do-it-yourself woman, you can remove those hairs using a depilatory cream, a regular razor, an electric shaver, or an epilator. I would recommend an electric shaver like the Panasonic Electric Shaver for Women for your legs, arms and bikini areas.

Benefits of using the Panasonic Electric Shaver for Women:

• It’s quick and easy.
• It works on wet or dry skin.
• It’s less painful than waxing or an epilator and more efficient than a regular razor.
• It’s great for sensitive skin.
• It’ll give you a close shave which is what you want.

How to use an electric shaver:

1) After taking a shower, apply shaving cream to the areas to be shaved.

2) Use the electric shaver to remove the hair.

3) Rinse your skin to remove the shaving cream residue and broken hairs.

4) Rinse the electric shaver to remove stuck hairs and shaving cream.

Beauty Tool 6: Electric Foot File

Have you ever been to a shoe store to try on shoes and just then, you realized that you haven’t given much attention to your feet in weeks or months? You quickly slip off your shoe and insert the new pair so that no one can see your unsightly feet.

To prevent this re-occurrence, it’s a good practice to dedicate time daily or weekly to caring for your feet especially your heels. Investing in the Amopé Pedi Perfect Wet & Dry Foot File will quickly and easily complete your foot care regimen.

Benefits of using Amopé Pedi Perfect Wet & Dry Foot File:

• It’s super quick.
• Your feet will become smooth like a baby’s.
• It will easily get rid of cracked heels and dry rough calloused skin.
• It can be used on wet or dry feet.
• It’s safe to use in the shower.

How to use Amopé Pedi Perfect Wet & Dry Foot File:

1) Ensure that the unit is charged.

2) Turn on the unit and move the device along the heel until the heel is smoothed. If you have thin skin on your heel, it is best to proceed gently and with caution.

3) Remove any ‘dust’ with a moistened tissue or with water if you’re in the shower or bath.

4) Moisturize the area.

Beauty Tool 7: Hair Dryer

When you’re a busy career woman, washing your hair may happen late at nights. Instead of going to bed with wet hair, it’s always good to have a hair dryer at hand. Also, it’s useful for women who live in colder climates.

Benefits of using the Revlon hair dryer:

• It dries your hair fast when you don’t have time to air dry your hair or the weather is too cold to air dry wet hair.
• It has a cold shot. (I prefer to dry my hair without heat.)
• It is good for stretching or shrinking your crocs shoes! Lol

How to use the Revlon Hair Dryer:

1) Choose a settling.

2) Dry your hair by moving the dryer all over.

Beauty Tool 8: Zyllion Shiatsu Back & Neck Massager

We all know that a professional body massage is quite pricey. It’s near impossible to perform a proper massage on our own backs and necks so you need some help. For your home spa, you can invest in a Zyllion Shiatsu Back & Neck Massager.

Benefits of using the Zyllion Shiatsu Back & Neck Massager:

• It relaxes you and removes muscle tension.
• The heating function promotes blood circulation.
• It’s portable. You can use it in your home or car or take it with you to work.
• It helps to relieve you of back pain and stress.

How to use the Zyllion Shiatsu Back & Neck Massager:

1) Strap device unto the chair.

2) Since heat is used, it is advisable to place a towel or blanket between you and the massager.

3) Turn on and enjoy your neck and back massage.

Please ensure that you read and follow the instruction manual for all the tools that you acquire. Ignorance is not bliss!

If you can’t afford any of those beauty tools at the moment, check out ‘Beauty on a Budget | 8 Money-Saving Tools’. Another article that might interest you is ‘Beauty in a Minute | 8 Quick Tips’.

There you have it, ladies! Eight essential beauty tools worthy of your time and money – heat cap, cleansing brush, shampoo brush, facial steamer, electric shaver, foot file, hair dryer, and a neck and back massager.

I really love gadgets. One of my friends used to call me ‘Sister Gadgets’. Lol

Which personality best describes you – ‘Live Lavishly Lorie’, ‘Miserly Mary’, ‘Perfectionist Penny’, ‘Bare-Bones Budget Betty’ and/or ‘Gifted Gina’? What beauty tools or gadgets have you used in your own home spa? I’d love to hear from you so please comment below.

Also, I invite you to subscribe and let’s have a conversation. You can always unsubscribe if you realize that it’s not your ‘cup of tea’. When you subscribe, you will also receive your FREE ‘Know Yourself’ questionnaire right in your Inbox. Thanks for stopping by!

Comment, Share & Subscribe!

With love,

Kimberly

“Petals Bloom is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.”

The post 8 Essential Beauty Tools for the Do-It-Yourself Woman appeared first on Petals Bloom.

You’re a student and money is tight.

You’re building your emergency fund. (That was me last year)

You’re about to buy a car or house or make some other major investment.

You’re temporarily unemployed.

Regardless of your current circumstance, you don’t need to sacrifice your beauty due to money constraints. I’ve been through spurts of financial challenges where I’ve had to become resourceful without sacrificing beauty.

As the old adage goes, ‘necessity is the mother of invention.’ Tight budgets are just opportunities to create and to discover.

The 2 main keys for maintaining your beauty on a budget are:

1) Using products that you already have.

2) Buy products which provide multiple uses throughout the home.

There are countless money-saving beauty tips for any woman. Below, I’ll just list 8 money-saving tips that I’ve used when my budget was tight:

‘Beauty on a Budget’ Tip 1: Baking soda as an exfoliator

Most homes have baking soda. You use it to bake; to clean your bathrooms; to clean your vegetables; and to absorb strong scents in your refrigerator (just to name a few).

To add to this awesome list of uses, baking soda can also be a great exfoliator. Just add a little to your facial cleanser and you’re good to go. Then, gently exfoliate your face. We should not be harsh with our faces.

‘Beauty on a Budget’ Tip 2: Aloe vera as a mask

If I had to choose only one plant to own, it would definitely be an aloe vera plant. It’s a household plant (or a garden plant) in many homes in the Tropics. An ‘aloes’ plant will serve many purposes. Some persons like its aesthetic appeal, while others use it for internal and external health benefits. For me, I find that it does wonders for my face. Here’s how I use it…

Remove the outer green ‘skin’ of the leaf to access the gel part. Then, use the slimy part of the gel on your face. I have found it particularly useful to combat acne. Before I go to bed, I usually apply it onto my clean face and then I wash my face (again) in the morning.

Warning: If your skin is very sensitive, test it on a small section of your skin before applying it to a larger area. In that way, you will discover any allergic reaction to the aloe vera.

The store-bought refined aloe vera gel can act as a substitute for your makeup base. I tried it recently and it worked extremely well. Maybe I’ll just replace my makeup base with this gel altogether. I’ll be saving heaps!

‘Beauty on a Budget’ Tip 3: Honey for a flawless complexion

Depending on where you live, honey could either be cheap or expensive. Honey has countless uses. Several years ago, when I returned to my home country after three years, my body’s response was a breakout. I was stressed because of the changes.

Then I began using a mixture of honey and lemon which helped to restore my face to its former glory. You can also apply honey without the lemon. When you’re doing household chores, you can apply honey on your face.

‘Beauty on a Budget’ Tip 4: Cocoa butter as a scar remover

When I was a teenager, I was plagued with the dreaded Chickenpox (known medically as Varicella). Unfortunately for me, my skin scars easily and I was left with dozens of blemishes. My face was a sight to behold, but not a pretty one.

Cocoa butter came to the rescue! It probably took about two months to notice the marks fading. But they slowly but surely became a thing of the past. You could imagine how grateful I was in those self-conscious years.

Raw cocoa butter could be purchased cheaply. I usually purchase cocoa butter blocks in a local beauty supply store. It can also be used to prevent dry skin and to heal chapped lips. Due to its oily nature and strong scent, I apply it at nights.

‘Beauty on a Budget’ Tip 5: Vicks VapoRub to prevent acne inflammation

I recall as a little girl, my mother would apply Vicks VapoRub on my chest, back and forehead whenever a cold had took over my little body. Our home always had a bottle of Vicks VapoRub in our medicine cabinet. Now, it has found its way among my beauty products.

Whenever I see an acne appearing, I apply Vicks VapoRub on the spot. I find that it prevents the acne from becoming inflamed.

‘Beauty on a Budget’ Tip 6: Apple Cider Vinegar and baking soda as a spot treatment

Three weeks before my wedding day, I had a facial done by an aesthetician. She observed my acne scars and post-inflammatory hyperpigmentation, so she advised me to apply a paste made with Apple cider vinegar and baking soda on my marks for ten minutes daily. Sadly to say, it did not happen. I was just too busy at the time. However, I’ve been doing it now. Together with the cocoa butter at nights, I have seen a visible reduction in both the acne scars and post-inflammatory hyperpigmentation .

Before I have my morning devotional times with God, I apply it on my face. While I converse with God, my face is being pampered. I only plan to use this paste from time to time as the need exists.

‘Beauty on a Budget’ Tip 7: Coconut oil … a miracle oil

You can’t go wrong with having coconut oil in your cupboard. It can be used to remove makeup; to moisturize your skin; to shave; to steam your hair; and of course, to cook. My mother adds it to her hot chocolate drink. With so many uses, it’ll be worth purchasing a large bottle. Try not to don’t skimp on quality.

‘Beauty on a Budget’ Tip 8: Get every drop out!

When you’re on a tight budget, you can’t afford wastage. Every drop of your product counts! I try to ‘milk’ every bottle. Some covers are flat. You can simply tilt the bottle upside down so that gravity does the work for you in releasing every drop.

However, some bottles cannot stand without the extra support. I purchased two Big Foot Bottle Emptiers many years ago and they still serve me well. Unfortunately, I don’t think that they are being manufactured anymore.

But don’t despair, alternatives are here.

Last Drop Bottle Emptier & Drainer

Zero Waste Cap

Flip-It Bottle Emptying Kit for Bath and Beauty

BONUS: Water, water, water…for everything (nearly)

Well, I couldn’t leave this one out. It’s cheap, generally plentiful, and improves your skin. If you really want beautiful skin, you cannot skip this step. You’ve got to drink lots of water to continually cleanse and hydrate your body.

During my undergraduate years, drinking water was irregular until my mother gave me an article about all the benefits of drinking water. Afterward, I was determined to make it a habit.

I gradually began to reduce my consumption of sugar-filled drinks and replace with water. And guess what …. I actually began loving water! We can train ourselves to do just about anything. God, our intelligent designer, made us with that awesome ability.

I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well. Psalm 139:14

Final Thoughts

You can try some of the above money–saving ‘beauty on a budget’ tips. Remember, you can use what you already have and/or invest in items that offer multiple uses like baking soda, an aloe vera plant (or gel), honey, cocoa butter, Vicks VapoRub, apple cider vinegar, and coconut oil. A bottle emptier is also a worthwhile investment.

These are tips that have working for me, but each person’s body is unique. What might work for me, may not necessarily work for you and vice versa.

If you choose to try any of the above, you do so at your own risk. I would also advise testing in a small area first to prevent any serious allergic reactions. But don’t skip drinking water though:)

What other beauty on a budget ideas have you personally used in your beauty regimen? I’d love to hear your ‘Beauty on a Budget’ money-saving tips and tricks.

If you haven’t already, check out the related article in the Pretty Single Series “Beauty in a Minute | 8 Quick Tips.”

Have you subscribed to Petals Bloom already? Gasp…you haven’t?!? What are you waiting for?:) When you subscribe, we can have a direct conversation. I love seeing responses from my subscribers as we build our relationship.

You’ll receive weekly email tips that just might help you grow in your relationship with God and others. As an added bonus, your FREE ‘Know Yourself’ questionnaire will be delivered straight to your Inbox.  Thanks for stopping by!

Comment, Share & Subscribe!

With love,

Kimberly

“Petals Bloom is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.”

The post Beauty on a Budget | 8 Money-Saving Tips appeared first on Petals Bloom.

Why it’s important…

But wait a minute… is it even important that you look your best physically?

Whether you’re going on a job interview; transacting business at the bank; selling a product; meeting a potential spouse; or your friend’s parents, the way you look will affect how you are treated. Read ‘Top 5 Attractive Qualities Single Men Want‘.

Your appearance speaks volumes

What is your personal brand? When a person first sees you, what impression does he/she immediately have of you? Do you look like a confident put-together woman? Are you enhancing your natural beauty?

Believe it or not, you are judged by your appearance and the truth be told, you also judge others by the way they look. Before a person sees your heart, they see your appearance.

• Does your hair look neat or untidy?
• Are your clothes ironed or do you look like you just rolled off the bed and strolled right into your office?
• As someone passes by, do you have a pleasant clean scent or is your body odor offensive?

“Dress how you want to be addressed.”

Bianca Frazier

Self-care is important

As a single woman, self-care needs to become a habit. It shows that you value yourself and that you’re a wise steward of your body. But as a busy professional, where can you find the time?

I know what it feels like to have a super crazy life. Therefore, I have had to implement little quick strategies to keep myself looking my best (most of the times). You too may not have a whole lot of dedicated time to beautify yourself, but by adding little daily routines that take less than a minute, your beauty can shine through.

Here are some daily ‘beauty in a minute’ tips that I’ve discovered that are quick and easy to do:

1) Smooth clean heels…beauty in a minute!

The buildup of dead skin under the feet can become hard and unsightly over time. Every morning, I use a pumice stone on my heels to remove dead dry skin. It is the last step of my shower routine so that the pumice stone can be applied to softened skin. You can either use it when your feet is lathered with soap or when your feet is simply wet. Either way works for me. Select the time of day that suits you best. Guess what…it takes less than a minute!

Needed: Pumice stone & water

Tip: Store the pumice stone in the bathroom within arm’s reach.  Otherwise, you may be prone to forget.

2) Long nails…beauty in a minute!

Nail technicians charge a lot.  I have had acrylic nails three times for short spurts. After every instance, I told myself ‘never again’. The last time that I did it, my nails were so brittle that it took over 6 weeks to recover.

On several occasions, I’ve grown out my nails naturally by applying olive oil throughout the day. This painless routine has saved me money, time and discomfort. You need a bottle of olive oil or another type of oil. Apply the oil often especially before you go to bed. Unless you have a medical condition, you’ll be sporting your own lovely long nails in no time! That too takes less than a minute.

Needed: Olive oil (or another alternative oil)

Tip: Have a little bottle next to your bed and carry a small bottle in your handbag.

3) Soft lips…beauty in a minute!

Before I retire to bed at nights, I apply lip balm. I wake up with soft lips and it takes less than a minute daily.

Needed: Lip balm or oil

Tip: Place it next to your bed or on your dresser.  Choose a place where it can be within your reach when you settle into bed.

4) Healthy hair…beauty in a minute!

I’ve been massaging my hair daily and it is so therapeutic. One minute is better than no minute. Scalp massages promote hair growth. As an added bonus, scalp massages also act as a stress reliever. It can be done in a minute, but you’d like it so much, you just might extend it to 5 minutes. But who’s counting?!? You can use your own fingers or invest in an electronic scalp massager.

Needed: Your fingers or an electronic scalp massager

Tip: I massage my scalp while I’m doing a mundane task like listening to music or watching TV.

5) Glowing skin…beauty in a minute!

You can take less than 1 minute to drink a glass of water.  Therefore, you need a maximum of 8 minutes daily to drink 8 glasses of water. That’s a small price to pay for beauty! I bought a 4-cup glass bottle which I placed on my work desk to save myself the hassle of 7 refills. It has also helped me to track my water consumption. When you’re going on the road, why not carry a water bottle with you?

I met one of my aunt’s friends that I hadn’t seen in years and she was looking very young. Honestly, she didn’t look like she had aged in over 10 years. Of course, I had to ask her about her beauty secrets. She said that she drinks at least 12 cups of water (8 ozs = 1 cup) throughout the day.  

From my own experience, my skin looks healthier and rosy when I consume at least 8 glasses of water daily.

Needed: Water and water bottles (32-ozs water bottle and an 20-oz water bottle)

Tip: Place a large water bottle on your desk for easy and quick access. When you’re going on the road, carry your water bottle filled with water.

6) Smooth face…beauty in a minute!

Try removing dead skin cells and dirt on your face by GENTLY applying an exfoliating cream/scrub 1-3 times weekly. Your makeup foundation will be applied easily and your skin will ‘glow’. I usually add Baking Soda to my cream cleanser, Aveeno Positively Radiant Brightening Cleanser at least once a week. Remember to be gentle because your face is very delicate.

An electronic cleansing brush like, Clarisonic Mia Prima 1-Speed Sonic Cleansing Brush, is also a good alternative. It is said that the Clarisonic Mia cleanses 6 times better than your hands alone. I bought one a few years ago and I love it!

Needed: Baking Soda and a cream cleanser like Aveeno Positively Radiant Brightening Cleanser and/or Clarisonic Mia Prima 1-Speed Sonic Facial Cleansing Brush

Tip: Place a small container of baking soda in your bathroom for this purpose.

7) Soft heels…beauty in a minute!

Apply a foot cream (or whatever lotion you have) on your feet before you go to bed and then wear a pair of socks overnight. An old pair will do just fine. When you wake up in the morning, your feet will be well-moisturized and soft.

Needed: Foot cream or body lotion and a pair of socks

Tip: Place these items close to your bed.

NOTE: It seems like lots of items need to be close to the bed! haha

8) Scented lady…beauty in a minute!

I personally believe that a woman should look good and smell good. For a lasting scent throughout the day, you can apply your favorite perfume to your bra and maybe even your undies. The fragrance will last much longer on fabric than on your skin. Skip this tip if you’re allergic to fragrances. In that case, regular showers would suffice.:)

Needed: Your favorite perfume or body spray or fragrance mist

Tip: None … just remember to spray it on your underwear (bra and panties).

Final thoughts

You don’t have to spend copious amounts of time beautifying yourself. As you practice self-care, your confidence will begin to grow even more. Remember, confidence is like a magnet. 

You can have smooth clean heels, long nails, soft lips, healthy hair, glowing skin, smooth face, soft heels, and smell beautifully. If you regularly apply these eight beauty tips daily, you’ll see improvement in your overall appearance.  What beauty tips can you share that takes a minute or less? Let’s swap ideas. Comment below.

I absolutely love helping young woman that’s why I have spent years mentoring and coaching young women. I’d like to invest in you too. In order for this to happen, you need to subscribe!

When you subscribe, you can ask questions directly and you will receive my weekly emails which are geared toward helping you in your relationships with God and others. Also, a FREE ‘Know Yourself’ questionnaire will be delivered right in your Inbox. How easy is that!

Thanks for stopping by!

Subscribe, share and follow!

With love,

Kimberly

“Petals Bloom is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.”

The post Beauty in a Minute | 8 Quick Tips appeared first on Petals Bloom.

What is the top attraction killer?

There seems to be a recurring theme in your life. You meet a fantastic guy. Subsequently, you hit it off (or so you think), but it quickly dies or never blossom into a committed relationship. Your friends and family think that you’re an amazing beautiful woman and wonder what is wrong with the single men around you. Are they blind?

Or is there something that you’re unknowingly doing that is short-circuiting your love life? If so, what is that top attraction killer? There could be many reasons contributing to your current single state, but the one not-so-obvious trait is DESPERATION. A state of desperation has very little to do with your physical attractiveness, intelligence, wit or your devotion to God. Many single women go through a period of desperation, spanning months or even years. Desperation acts like a ‘man repellant’. It is the top attraction killer.

I too have gone through the desperate phase and during that time, suitors were very very few. The persons who pursued me during that time were persons in whom I had not an ounce of interest. What a dilemma… no interest from the guys you like and keen interest from those you don’t like!

The most common contributing factors of desperation:

• You’ve experienced rejection due to a failed relationship;
• You sense that your biological clock is quickly ticking away and there’s no husband-to-be in sight;
• Your self-worth has been crushed due to a debilitating life event; and/or
• You have internalized demeaning and negative insults about your self-worth from persons in your life.

Factors one and two were my culprits. It wasn’t easy, but my freedom started when I faced my desperation. Like me, you may not even be aware of your desperate behavior. However, the sooner you come to terms with this, the faster than you can overcome it and increase your level of attractiveness. Like any real breakthrough in life, you must first face the truth.

Although it might not be obvious to us, men can ‘smell’ desperation in a woman. Is this top attraction killer evident in your life?

Here are some signs to help you see if the top attraction killer is in your life:

1) You get attached too quickly.

You just met ‘Charlie’. The mutual attraction was unexplainable! Furthermore, you had several long enjoyable conversations with him. You have so much in common that it must be a match made in Heaven. You begin to daydream about your wedding day with ‘Charlie’ as your much-desired long-awaited groom. What a beautiful wedding it will be! Who should you invite?

You begin to text ‘Charlie’ every day and you get upset when he is talking too long to respond. When you see him talking to another woman, you begin to get jealous and even give him the ‘cold shoulder’. You share with your girlfriends that you and ‘Charlie’ are becoming a couple. Poor ‘Charlie’! He’s oblivious that he’s featuring in your wedding dream. To him, you’re an attractive woman, but he hardly knows you. He’s perturbed that you’re so intense. He is beginning to wonder what has happened.

Ladies, if a man doesn’t plainly express to you that he’s romantically interested in you; that he wants to be in a relationship with you; or that he wants to marry you, do not begin to fantasize about your life with him as his wife. Even the shyest man on the face of the planet will get the courage to declare his love to the woman he wants (when he’s ready). Do not take this privilege away from him. You don’t want to force a man to be with you.

Questions to consider:

Do you …

• Find yourself fantasizing about the ‘new guy’ shortly after meeting him?
• Think that you’re in a relationship with someone who has made no such  commitment?
• Bring up the talk of marriage too quickly?
• Come across as too intense?
• Share your feelings too soon?
• Get upset when he’s taking too long to reply to your messages?
• Convince yourself that a guy likes you and he has made no such indications?

If you get attached too quickly, that top attraction killer is evident!

2) You’ve lost your head.

You once believed that you’ll wait until marriage for sex. But now, you’ve thrown that virtue away to please with your love interest. Perhaps, you tolerate abuse because you’re afraid of remaining single all the days of your life. When you’re desperate, you begin to compromise values and beliefs you previously held dearly. Check out ‘6 Reasons Why Virginity is STILL Wonderful’ and ‘7 Tips to Win at Sexual Purity‘.

You do things that you never thought you’d do prior to meeting him. You begin to lose yourself and behave foolishly. I remember that I was with a male friend, who I found to be rather attractive, and his shoelace became untied. Do you know what I offered to do?!? I am ashamed to admit it but I bent down and offered to tie them …in the middle of a shopping plaza! What in the world was I thinking? Nothing was wrong with his own two hands. When you’re desperate, you don’t act in your right mind and then you behave in a manner that your more sensible self would never do. That top attraction killer is clouding your judgement.

Questions to consider:

• Are you too eager to please a man that you end up doing things that are against your better judgement?
• Do you wait ‘hand and foot’ on your boyfriend?
• Have you compromised your once-held values on sexual purity?
• Are you pursuing someone else’s boyfriend, fiancé or husband?

3) You change who you are.

You morph into a different person to please a man who has caught your attention. Unknowingly, you become the woman that you think he wants. You’re not into sports and suddenly, you become the biggest sports fan. You pretend that sports has always been your favorite hobby. His favorite foods are now your favorites. You dislike classical music, but now you have a ‘Classical’ music playlist that only gets playtime when he’s in your presence. You dress only in the way that you think he likes.

Furthermore, you always agree with him, even if your personal views are different from his. In essence, you’ve lost your identity. It’s exhilarating to meet someone who has similar interests, but no man wants to marry a female-version of himself. That’s way too boring. Besides, if you don’t like and value yourself, why should anyone else enjoy being with you?

Questions to consider:

• Do you hide the real you when you’re with someone?
• Do you change your entire appearance to please a man?
• Are you always agreeing with the man in whom you’re interested?
• Do you change who you are to be with a guy?
• Have you begun to wear revealing clothing so that men will see your sexiness?
• Do you send him suggestive/nude photos of yourself?
• Are you afraid to disagree with someone that you like?
• Do you enjoy your own company?

4) You don’t have a life.

If you are constantly available to a guy, it means that you have no life apart from him. When he messages you, you respond with the speed of lightning. When he calls you, you’re always available to chat. Whenever he asks to go out with you ‘today for tomorrow’, you always have time. Ladies, you’re setting up yourself for being taken for granted. No one will adore a woman who has no life of her own or whose whole life is centered around him (unless he’s a controlling insecure man). Read ‘6 Guys to Resist’.

Questions to consider:

Do you …

• Message the new guy in your life too frequently?
• Constantly check your phone to see if he has messaged you?
• Try to never miss a phone call from him?
• Change your plans whenever he calls last-minute to go out with you?
• Convince yourself that you’re in a relationship with a man who has not clearly declared his intentions?

I went to a Christian concert and I met a guy. Without a doubt, I wasn’t romantically interested in him, but I didn’t mind being his friend. I checked his profile on Facebook and I noticed that we had about 15 mutual friends comprising persons who I trust. Therefore, I thought it was safe to give him my phone number. Within 2 hours (or less) after the concert, the guy called me 4 times! What madness! I was annoyed to say the least. Desperation in both sexes is repulsive. Undoubtedly, it is a top attraction killer.

5) You are overly obsessed with getting married.

Marriage can become an idol for single women. Most of us begin dreaming about our wedding and marriage from a young age. A friend’s teenage daughter already has several Pinterest boards dedicated to her wedding. When these dreams are not realized, we can become desperate. Does your happiness depend on your relationship status? At times, it is natural to feel frustrated and disappointed about your unmet desire, but your desire for marriage should not dominate your entire life and emotions. Check out ‘5 Compelling Reasons Why Singleness is Beautiful’ and ‘Single and Disappointed-5 Helpful Tips to Deal With it‘.

“Anything I put before my God is an idol.
Anything I want with all my heart is an idol.
Anything I can’t stop thinking of is an idol.
Anything that I give all my love is an idol.
We must not worship something that’s not even worth it.
Clear the stage and make some space for the one who deserves it.
Cause I can sing all I want to.
Yes I can sing all I want to
I can sing all I want to
And still get it wrong, worship is more than a song.”
Lyrics excerpt from the song ‘Clear the Stage’ by Ross King

Questions to consider:

• Has marriage become an idol in your life?
• If you never got married, would you be happy and content?
• If God never gave you the gift of a spouse, would you turn your back on Him and rebel?
• Has singleness led you to be disobedient to God?

In Exodus 20:3 (KJV), it is written, “You shall have no other gods before Me.” A man could never ever fully satisfy us. Only God can. As single Christian woman, you need to know that marriage is not the reason for your existence. Jesus is.

I’m very familiar with the torturous feelings of desperation. At times, your emotions can be so intense that you need more than will power to act wisely with a guy that you like. In “Cure Desperation | 6 Tips to Become a Confident Attractive Woman”, I have shared with you what you can do get rid of this monster of desperation that is your top attraction killer.

What is your story? Have you ever felt so desperate that you lost all sense of reason? What are other clues that a woman (or man) is desperate for a relationship? I would love to hear your views. Comment below and subscribe to get my weekly email tips to help strengthen your relationship with God and others in your life. I love interacting with my subscribers. As an added bonus, when you subscribe, you receive your free ‘Know Yourself’ questionnaire. I look forward to continuing the conversation via email.

Comment, Share & Subscribe!

With love,

Kimberly

“Petals Bloom is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.”

The post The Top Attraction Killer – 5 Signs You Have It appeared first on Petals Bloom.

Can a simple daily habit of journaling change your life?

Do you find yourself becoming short-tempered?  Are you becoming moodier and joyless?  But the thing is…you have no clue what is causing these emotions.

Sometimes, you can be so busy doing life, that conversations and events occur that disturb you and you’re totally unaware of their impact.  Slowly but surely, your joy begins to dissipate little by little.  

Next thing you know, you’re a little down in the dumps and you have no clue how or why it has happened.  You’ve lost touch with yourself.

To avoid the pitfalls of a super busy life with no time to think and no emotional self-awareness, you may want to consider journaling.  Without a doubt, journaling can help you to stay emotionally healthy as you take time to reflect.  

I began this practice a few years ago and it has made a world of difference in my own life. As a result, I generally feel happy and emotionally healthy!

Here are some reasons why you may want to begin journaling NOW:

1) Know and understand yourself .

Journaling will help you to be better acquainted with your emotions.   To write a journal entry, you will need to stop from all your activities, sit down, think and then write.

These simple steps are powerful in helping you to reflect on your day and be in touch with your thoughts and feelings.  

You can ask yourself the following questions:

• “What happened today for which I am thankful?”
• “How am I feeling right now?” (Happy, joyful, frustrated, sad, disappointed, anxious, satisfied, fulfilled, angry, jealous, resentful, etc.)
• “What events or conversations have influenced the emotions that I currently feel?”
• “Has someone wronged me?”
• “Did I hurt or offend someone?”
• “Who do I need to forgive today?” (The incident might have occurred today or in the past)
• “What help do I need from God?”
• “What is God saying to me?” (About His character, about yourself and/or about your circumstances)

These are not exhaustive.  You can ask yourself any question that comes to your mind. I’ve found that sometimes I cannot recall what happened during the day that made me feel wretched.

I’m only aware that my emotions are ‘off’. In those times, I immediately ask the Holy Spirit to show me and He comes to my rescue every time.

You cannot address an issue if it’s hidden. It needs to be brought into the light.

2) Dealing with toxic emotions.

By journaling, it will help to release pent up toxic emotions. Let it all out through your writing. I recommend journaling to God because I like writing to someone and I know He can handle it.  

No other human being needs to know. All of us have baggage, but it can get heavier and heavier as the days and years go by.

Deliberately unpack your baggage everyday. As such, daily journaling helps you to manage stress better. It will also help you to gain clarity concerning why you have those toxic emotions.

In time, you will begin to make connections. Who or what has caused them? Why are you feeling this way about what happened? What is the root cause of your reaction?

3) Healing and freedom.

When you begin to admit and release your hurts and pains through journaling, you will begin to feel better. Ten years after a failed engagement, it dawned on me that I had some unresolved hurt and anger.  

In the book “Love the Life You Live: 3 Secrets to Feeling Good Deep Down in Your Soul”, the Les Parrott recommends taking time to write about a disturbing experience.  

Subsequently, I took the time and penned a letter about how I felt. I was totally transparent as I wrote. Afterward, I discarded the letter, but it helped me to experience another level of healing.  

Research has shown that writing your feelings helps you gain freedom from the past. You can even address the letter to a person with whom there has been a grievance and then you can subsequently destroy it.

The contents of the letter will be between you and God. That’s the power of journaling in action!

4) Prevent you from hurting others

Sometimes you just want to vent, but venting directly to the person (the object of your frustration) may not be helpful at all.  Hence, it can severely hurt a relationship.

How many times have you wished that you had held your tongue when you were angry? When your senses returned, you realized that you made a big mistake. Let’s face it – words hurt and can do a whole lot of damage.  

Why don’t you try journaling about it instead? In that way, you get your emotions out without hurting someone else. Choose self-control instead and use another means to release your anger.

Proverbs 17:27-28 says, ‘the one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered. Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues.’

If you still feel a need to express your feelings to the person, then ask God for wisdom on what you should say, how you should say it and when it should be done. Timing is crucial!

‘Even a fish wouldn’t get into much trouble if he would keep his mouth shut.” – Miscellaneous

5) Improve your ability to speak

Another benefit of journaling is that it will improve your ability to clearly articulate your thoughts when you speak. When you journal, you become more aware of your internal ramblings.

As you form your thoughts and feelings into words through your journaling, you will become a better oral communicator.

Do you have challenge with expressing your thoughts? Then, journaling might be a good starting point for your growth in this area.

6) Track your growth

You can have a good laugh or cry when you reread your past journal entries. In time, you can see how you’ve grown and changed. As such, your journal entries can serve as an encouragement to you.

Additionally, you will observe the ways in which God has answered your prayers.

7) Enhance your writing skills

This goes without saying …whatever you practice often, you will eventually master.  Think about how much easier it would be for you to write emails, reports, course assignments, etc.  

When I was doing the coursework assignments for my Masters degree, it was less stressful for me to produce hundreds of pages of academic writing because I had the habit of journaling daily.

8) Develop content for a blog or book

You never know how the content of your journals might be used for a future writing project (like a blog or a book). Your journals can earn you money in the future. Does an autobiography tickle your fancy?

9) Pass on a legacy

After you’ve passed from this life, your journals would probably be left behind. In essence, your journals can serve as an inspiration to your family, friends or even the world.  

For instance, “Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl” was the compilation of journal entries of a young Jewish girl during World War II. She never knew at the time of her writing, that her diary would later be a blessing to the world.

10) Internalize your learnings

When you write, your capacity for learning is greater. If you journal after you read or study the Bible, you’ll probably remember the lesson more. Not only will you be able to recall the essence of the story or principle, but it will likely cause a change in your mindset, your values and future actions.

Also, you can do a book journal. After you read a book, you can further solidify your learnings by journaling about the book.

Summary

Above, I’ve shared 10 reasons why the habit of journaling can change your life. There are many other compelling reasons for journaling beside those outlined.

It’s an extremely important tool to help you to debrief your day and stay emotionally healthy, along with the other awesome benefits. Read the article ‘10 Easy Tips to Start Journaling TODAY’ to make it an regular enjoyable habit.

Also, join my 21-day journal challenge and get your FREE journal printable.  Comment below and let me know if you have personally found journaling helpful and the reasons why you do it or why you would like to start doing it.  Let’s have a conversation.

Don’t forget to subscribe! You’ll receive your FREE ‘Know Yourself’ questionnaire which is a good resource for your journal entries. Also, you will receive my weekly emails to help you in your journey with Christ.

As a subscriber, you can interact with me through email. I personally answer all emails.

I hope you find the rewards of journaling like I have. Happy journaling!

#madetolove

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With love,

Kimberly

Recommended Books:

“Love the Life You Live: 3 Secrets to Feeling Good Deep Down in Your Soul” by Les Parrott

“Anne Frank: The Diary of Young Girl” by Anne Frank

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The post 10 Life-Changing Reasons to Begin Journaling NOW appeared first on Petals Bloom.