Have you ever found yourself wondering what eligible single Christian men want in a wife? Do you wonder if you have what it takes to attract your ‘complimentary fit’. I’ve read lots of books on the subject, but I decided to conduct my own survey among Christian single men. Suitable candidates for this survey had to meet the following criteria:
- Seeking to truly follow Jesus Christ.
- Earning an income.
- Having a desire to marry.
Here are the top five attractive qualities that single Christian men want in a wife:
1) Kind-hearted and gentle.
They want someone who loves and cares for others. A woman who is thoughtful and expresses concerns for others will set their hearts at ease. A man wants to know that his wife will be kind and tender toward him, their children, his parents and others who will come into their lives as they serve God together.
Tip: Start (or continue) to care for someone who is not able to return the favour.
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2) Faith in God.
A man who loves God also wants to marry a woman who loves God. These men understand that the spiritual dimension in a husband and wife relationship is very powerful and cannot be underestimated. They find it invaluable to be with a woman who knows how to pray and how to depend on God.
Although marriage is hard work, they believe that if they join with the right godly woman, the marriage has the potential to be rich and fulfilling as they serve God together and they help each other to grow to love God more.
Tip: Aim to spend regular time in prayer to God everyday.
3) Intelligence.
Contrary to what is sometimes believed, these sensible godly men want a woman who is smart and intelligent. They want a woman who is intentionally developing her mind and can engage in intellectually stimulating conversations. They don’t want to be bored. Besides that, they want to know that their good genes can be passed down to the next generation. Yes, they want smart offspring!
Tip: Choose a new topic that you want to learn about and have a plan to learn as much as you can.
4) Supportive.
This should be no surprise for you since the Bible clearly states that the woman was created to be a helpmeet for the man. Now, being a helpmeet is NOT a derogatory subservient position since the Holy Spirit is also called our Helper. It is in fact a position of tremendous honour and privilege that we should take seriously.
You might be wondering about your own dreams. Do not fear. A humble secure godly man will also come alongside you and be supportive of your own vision. Together, you too can become a powerful couple in accomplishing a lot more together than either of you could have done alone.
Tip: If you have a boss or leader, try to serve in the best way you can so that he/she will shine.
5) Physically attractive.
Well, you know this one would have made it into the top five! All men are visual. If he is going to be with a woman every day of his life; be sexually intimate with her; and have children together, this would definitely be of high priority to him.
The good news is that there’s hope for every woman, regardless of your size, shape, complexion, or type of hair. There’s no ‘one size fits all’. Of course, each woman has to learn to accentuate her best features and learn to take good care of herself.
Tip: Find out which colors and clothing style best accentuate your natural beauty and begin to change your wardrobe.
‘A good look has to be supported by a personality/character. Otherwise, it’s only a good look and not a girl I’d consider for a relationship.’ David
Remember, you are a beauty … or at least you have potential if you take care of yourself!
Summary
All of us can become women who are highly attractive to at least one man. You only need one man to marry! I know it can be very powerful to be considered attractive to many men, but that is vanity. The qualities above can be achieved by all of us, even those who think they fall short in the area of physical attractiveness.
Look around you and you’ll observe that women of varying degrees of physical attractiveness get married. How many of them look like Miss Universe or Miss World? Therefore, they must have qualities that are beyond what the world deems as attractive. They probably possess other amazing attributes like a pretty smile, striking confidence, a contagious laugh, a magnetic personality, an adventurous spirit, etc. Truly, ‘beauty is in the eyes of the beholder’ and you will be beautiful to some special man one day.
To recap, here are the top five attractive qualities that single Christian men want in a wife:
- Kind-hearted and gentle
- Faith in God
- Intelligence
- Supportive
- Physically attractive
Were any of the qualities above eye-openers to you about what single Christian men want? Please comment below since I would love to hear your views.
Thanks for stopping by!
#madeforlove
With love & laughter,
Kimberly Garth
Other Helpful Resources:
Top 5 Turn-offs for Single Men
5 Rare Qualities Mature Christian Men Want
10 Practical Ways to Improve Your Chances of Meeting the One
It’s hard for some women to believe that we need to be beautiful “for them”. It’s hard because we are not as visual as they are… but we do want someone who shows his love toward us with a kind and sweet love… I think that might sounds weird for them because it’s not their tendency… in this I can see how beautifully complete is the image of God in us as human beings ❤️🙏🏽
As women, we should appreciate the differences between men and women and celebrate how wise God is in creating our uniqueness. Men and women truly complete each other.
I also think that making men and women different from one another is God’s funny way of teaching us to be selfless. God calls us to be servants and to die to ourselves and in a marriage, both parties really have to do that everyday to make it work. The great result is that by committing to relinquish our wills for our partners, it creates this awesome symbiotic relationship and this cycle of love and appreciation. He gets what he needs, which makes him willing to sacrifice for what she wants, which makes her more more willing to sacrifice for what he wants etc. etc.
Sometimes men and women put their foot down and say that they won’t sacrifice until the other partner sacrifices first and I think that’s a mistake in a marriage. Both have to understand from the get go, that marriage isn’t primarily about what you can get from your partner but how can give to them.
Candace, it sounds like you have a lot of insight into marriage!:) Thanks for sharing! You’ve made some really good points.
It’s always good to hear the views of males about what they desire in a woman….Another thing that could be added is having common goals and visions. I think a relationship will be more fruitful when both persons are aligned to the same vision and are ultimately in line with God’s vision.
Thanks, DK!:)
Great insight Kim. Thanks for posting.
Thanks, M.S.!:)
Awesome post! These are all true… and the last point is sometimes either overlooked or overemphasized. You have expressed it in a way that shows how we should have a balanced view of physical attractiveness. Real talk!
Yes, Adaisa! ‘A wise man avoids all extremes’.:)
Thanks for sharing Kim! I really like to read your posts. It is very interesting to know a little more about what a Christian men find attractive, but also all this qualities are very important in our relationship with family and friends! They’d like to have a kind-hearted and supportive sister, daughter or friend 🙌🏾. So this qualities are also part of our life
I totally agree! How we treat our family and friends right now will be a good indication of the way we will treat our husbands.
I have a question on how supportive is supportive? Would trying to assist if they are not in a good financial place be too supportive? Is it a turn off to support a guy for a period he is down or should the female allow him to help himself and separate for a while?
Hi M.S., if you’re not married to a man, I would not advise financially supporting him at this point. You can support him by encouraging him, listening to him, and praying for him. Be his cheerleader at this time:)