Could it be possible that your future husband is already in your life? Are you destroying your love life by having too many restrictions? You probably know several gentlemen who might make terrific husbands for you. That’s good news because you only need one!😉
As I wrote in the post ‘5 Truths About Why You’re Still Single’, I shared with you how I elevated my profession above all others. I felt that any man with a different profession was not even worthy of my consideration. In plain truth, I was not open. This close-mindedness was probably the biggest reason why I stayed single for so long.
BE THE RIGHT WOMAN FOR THE RIGHT MAN!
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Here are 5 guys to consider as future husbands:
1) The ‘Regular Church’ Guy
When I was growing up, anything church-related was equated to boring, especially the men. I pictured myself with a ‘bad boy’… a man who was rough, exciting, dangerous, mysterious, courageous and who had the world of experience, particularly in the sexual area.
Thank God that I didn’t marry younger until good sense prevailed! I think we can safely blame the media for characterizing ‘the bad guy’ as the most appealing guy. But I assure you, that’s only in the movies.
Real-life bad guys may leave you pregnant and alone; suffering from heart break because of abuse and neglect; and struggling with constant feelings of insecurity because you know he’s a player. I didn’t even mention sexual transmitted diseases. Is that the life you dreamed of as a little girl?
You want a happy stable home environment, so leave the drama for the movies. I know you don’t want a boring guy either. I personally like men who can lead; who have courage; who can take some risks; who are adventurous; and who can challenge me. Let’s not confuse true masculinity with a man who makes continually poor choices. In
“Bad company corrupts good character.” 1 Corinthians 15:33
Why not consider the wholesome healthy guy who goes to church? I am quite aware that there are church-going men who have all the religious talk but no depth of character. Stay away from those! Need help knowing if he’s worth your time, get my 7 Tips to Get to Know a Guy Better!
You need someone who is intentionally growing in his relationship with God and the evidence of this is reflected in his conduct. Also, ask other persons about him. If he has a good testimony with others, then he’s a guy that you should consider as husband-material.
2) The ‘Less-Educated’ Guy
I know that some women may not even consider a man who has less formal education that herself. Attending a university does not define a person’s intelligence. Undoubtedly, you want someone with whom you can have an intelligent conversation.
You may already know that some of the most successful persons in the world dropped out of college like Steve Jobs (Apple & Pixar), Bill Gates (Microsoft) and Mark Zuckerberg (Facebook). Therefore, you don’t need to ‘ex-out’ men who have not gone through the formal education system.
If you need to figure him out, get my 7 Tips to Get to Know a Guy Better plus access to my resource library (while it is free).
3) The ‘Not-Ideal-Career’ guy
It sounds good to say that my boyfriend or fiancé or husband is a doctor, attorney, professor, engineer, CEO and other affluent-sounding careers. However, a person’s actual occupation has very little bearing on the success of a marriage. Is your security and significance based on the occupation of the man who is beside you?
On the contrary, you need a husband who is hard-working; who loves you; who will make time for you and the children; who is growing to love God more; and putting first the building of God’s kingdom.
There are many good men out there who fit that description without the glamorous ‘titles’. Let your values be based on God’s Word and not on society. We need to focus more on character than occupation. You’re marrying him and not his job. Fantastic future husbands can be found among every honest profession.
4) The ‘Earns-Less-Than-Me’ guy
How many houses can you live in at the same time? Why do we need a gigantic house and when we get old, we have to downsize because it’s just too much work to maintain? How much lobster can one eat?
Notwithstanding, money is very important so I would strongly recommend that you choose a man who has a legitimate income. However, you don’t need to be with a rich man in order to live comfortably.
If you already earn a decent salary, he’s not less of a man if he earns less than you. Some careers simply earn more money than others. You have to look at the depth of his character. Hard-working disciplined men would make dependable future husbands!
These are some questions to ask:
- Is he a saver?
- Is he a spender?
- Does he know how to invest?
- Does he live above his means?
With some wise financial decisions, you both can secure a sound financial future. There are many people who earn very sizable salaries, but they are always broke because they spend more than they earn. Hence, choose a financially wise man and not necessarily a man who just earns more than you.
5) The ‘Friend-Zone’ guy
This guy is your friend and you get along very well. However, you just can’t see yourself marrying him. The popular saying ‘familiarity breeds contempt’ can be aptly applied. You want someone ‘new’ and ‘fresh’.
However, after the honeymoon phase of a relationship, you actually need a best friend. You need someone that you trust who has similar views and values; who is loyal to you; whom you enjoy; and who loves you unconditionally. If this guy fits that profile, why not consider him as a potential husband? Don’t let the unrealistic views of Hollywood spoil a good thing. Otherwise, some other woman with eyes to see will come and swoop him up!
Close male friends might make good future husbands!
BONUS (Other Future Husbands)
You can also consider a man who is younger or older than you are. You need to know what you’re comfortable with, but I have not seen any age restrictions in the Bible. Depending on the age difference, you would have some challenges related to the age gap, so be sober in your decision-making. However, with communication, understanding and flexibility, it can become a great marriage.
Summary
Look around you with a “fresh” eyes and you just might be several great future husbands!
The world culture has impacted all of us. Our decisions on relationships has been influenced more by the world than the Word of God. No wonder that so many Christian marriages are in trouble! You need to make a very sober decision about the man you will agree to marry.
When next you review your husband list, measure it against the principles of God’s Word and the character of God. He will not lead you astray. If God hasn’t put a restriction, then be more open!😀 Behind every successful man is a strong, wise, supportive woman. You can be that sort of woman.
What are your views? Is there any guy in your life that you’d like to reconsider? I would love to hear your opinions so please leave a comment below.
With love & laughter,
Kimberly Garth
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Recommended Books:
The Mark of A Man: Following Christ’s Example of Masculinity by Elisabeth Elliot
Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul by John Eldridge
The New Eve: Choosing God’s Best for Your Life by Robert Lewis & Jeremy Royal Howard
Let Me Be A Woman by Elisabeth Elliot
My my, this is a really convicting post, plenty of truth in this.
I want to be a real as possible to prevent other women from making the same mistakes like myself:)