Have you ever heard the quote, “A verse a day keeps the devil away?”  I’m certain that was my mantra many years ago.  To ensure that he was kept away, I added two more verses!

For me, spending time with God seemed more like a duty than a delight for years!  Guilt would often plague me, but it did nothing to help me to spend time with God every day.  Then, one summer, I attended a training and I heard three powerful words that would forever change my time with God – “JUST SHOW UP!”  It’s simplisticity took all the emotional drama out of it.  

Related Article:

10 Easy Tips to Start Journaling today 

From that time onwards, I began to spend time with God every day and also learnt to enjoy it.  Talking about enjoying it?  You just might be interested in getting 25 Awesome Ideas to Spend Time with God. Some of them might just surprise you!

Here are 6 tips to spend time with God every day and enjoy it:

1) Ask God to give you the desire.

God loves you and He wants an intimate relationship with You.  Also, He knows that it’s in your best interest to spend time with Him, so ask for His help.  Undoubtedly, you want to spend time with God because you want to and not only because you have to.  In essence, love is a much better motivation than guilt in helping you to spend time with God every day.

“And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. 15 And if we know that he hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of him.” 1 John 5:14-15

2) Make a date with God and show up.

You cannot allow your emotions to run your life.  Instead of not spending time with God, decide that you will do it and when you will do it, whether you feel like it or not.  

Sometimes, I am not in the mood to exercise (raise your hand if you can identify ), but I have made a commitment to myself to exercise on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.  What do I do?  I simply start my YouTube exercise video; change into my exercise clothes; collect my hand weights; and begin exercising.  I don’t spend time deliberating if I’m in the mood or not.  I just do it.  

Similarly, make a daily date with God.  Set a time and a place and just show up!  When that time comes, go to your place of meeting with God (even if it’s kneeling by your bedside) and spend time with Him.  (I would not recommend lying horizontally on your bed because you’ll end up in a deep sleep instead).

NOTE:  I’m aware that you can talk with God all the time throughout the day which is wonderful.  However, it is equally important to set aside time with God in the same way that you crave quality time with your loved ones.  

3) Form a habit of spending time with God.

You are a creature of habit.  If you were to observe your morning routine (comprising habits), it might look similar to this: wake up; reach for your phone; look at messages; whisper a prayer to God; go to the bathroom; make tea/coffee; etc.  

When you add spending time with God to your morning, day or night routines, the habit will become second nature to you.  Feelings will no longer be a determining factor if it happens or not.  Of course, there might be times that you may miss it for various reasons and in those times, be gracious to yourself.  

In essence, carve out a specific time to spend time with God for the next 21 days.  Then repeat for 2 more cycles.  After that, it will certainly become a no-brainer!  In time, you will see that your spirit and soul is being refreshed daily and you’ll begin to look forward to it!

4) Choose the best time for you.

Your body has developed a rhythm that works best for you.  I prefer to get up early and go to bed by 10pm.  My husband is the opposite.  As a result, I spend time with God in the morning and write in my journal before I sleep.  

It’s more important that you spend time with God than no time at all. Therefore, select the time where you can give God your best.

WHAT YOU NEED:

5) Have a plan when you spend time with God.

What will you do during this time?  Will you pray?  Which book of the Bible will you read?  Are you going to study a passage?  As the saying goes, “If you fail to plan, plan to fail.”  If you have no plan, your chances of going back to sleep is very high!  

Also, you might be stuck in a rot because your routine is too boring for you.  Even your time with God should reflect how God has uniquely made you.  For ideas, get your 25 Awesome Ideas to Spend Time with God in my free resource library.  At the bottom, I’ll direct you to the password.

6) Understand and embrace your uniqueness.

I once heard about a guy who eats peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for breakfast every single day.  That will never work for me.  I’ll be totally bored with eating breakfast after a few weeks!  

In the same way, you need to know yourself and what will help you to enjoy your time with God.  You don’t need to compare yourself with others and what they do.  Since you are unique, what will help you to connect with God (and enjoy it) may look differently to someone else.  Hence, I’ve created a list of 25 Awesome Ideas to Spend Time with God to give you other options.  This can be found in my free resource library and you can get the password at the bottom. Remember that God is the Creator and we need not box Him in.

“Variety is the very spice of life, That gives it all its flavor” – William Cowper (The Task, 1975)

Related article:

Doing This Changed My Life (How to Memorise An Entire Book of the Bible)

It is totally common to skip spending time with God.  However, as a growing Christian woman, your desire is to spend quality time with God every day.  Just feeling guilty about it is not helpful at all.  Guilt just weighs us down and nothing fruitful is borne.

What has helped you to spend time with God every day?  Comment below and share with the entire Petals Bloom Community.  

Thanks for stopping by!

#madeforlove

With love & laughter,

Kimberly Garth 

Get my list of 25 Awesome Ideas to Spend Time with God.

Get the password for my library HERE along with the free list by filling out this form.

The post How to Spend Time With God Every Day AND Enjoy It! appeared first on Petals Bloom.

Without a doubt, many of us are saddened by the loss of lives.  To further compound the matter, millions of people have lost their jobs or earning capacity. 

How can you have joy in the midst of this crisis?

While you may not be able to control the ravaging effects of covid-19, you can control the way in which you respond.  Yes, you can still have joy!

“Whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down, without walls.” Proverbs 25:28 

“A person can endure anything that life throws at him if he understands that he has the freedom to choose what to feel about each situation he faces, no matter how strongly he is opposed by outside forces that he cannot control.” Viktor Frankl in ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’

Here are 8 tips on how to have joy in the midst of a crisis:

1) Count your blessings.

When a crisis occurs, you have two choices.  Are you going to fill your mind with all that is going wrong and might go wrong?  Or are you going to recall all your current blessings and opportunities that the crisis has brought?  

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” Philippians 4:8 ESV

In order to follow Philippians 4:8, you have to intentionally train yourself to be grateful.  Firstly, you need to pay attention to your thought life.  When a less-than-desirable situation occurs, what is your natural tendency? (If you don’t know, ask a relative or friend.)

If you have developed a habit of negative thinking over the years, this is a good time to replace it with a positive mindset that is based on God’s Word.

Action steps:

• When you wake up, write down 10 things for which you are grateful.
• If a trying situation arises, think about 5 opportunities that you have because of it.
• Before you go to bed, recall 5 things for which you are grateful.

If you need a little help, get your free “100 Things to be Thankful for” list.

Also, check out “7 Great Opportunities from This Pandemic.”

Here are some blessings and opportunities from this crisis:

• Re-evaluate your life and priorities and make corrections.
• Spend more time with God.
• Experience God as your provider, protector, comforter, etc.
• Motivate you to study what the Bible says about the end times.
• Deepen relationships with family and friends.
• Provide an opportunity to have a much-needed change in career (especially if you’ve lost your job).

“Anything that makes us need God is a blessing.” Nancy Leigh DeMoss Wolgemuth

2) Be a light and a voice of hope to others.

People are grieving, worried and panicking all over the world.  As such, they need hope.  The best hope you can give is the message of eternal life and peace that comes from a relationship with Jesus Christ. 

Hence, if you know someone is having a particularly rough time, reach out to them.  Listen to them; share Jesus with them; and pray with them.  I don’t think anyone is refusing prayer these days!

3) Fill your life with God’s Word.

When you read God’s Word, it helps to put everything into the right perspective – death, suffering, healing, comfort and everything else under the sun. 

In the times ahead, life may become even more challenging.  Therefore, you need to prepare yourself by studying, meditating and memorizing God’s Word.  

Many Christians may read God’s Word, but not necessarily believe it.  This is the time for the Word of God to come alive in every believer’s life.

“In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, …” Ephesians 6:16-17 ESV

4) Dedicate time to sing and dance.

In a recent conversation with a woman who lost her beloved husband five years ago, she said that praising God through song during that difficult period allowed her to cope well and experience God’s peace.  Hearing her speak, I detected no bitterness about her loss.  

During this crisis, set aside time daily to sing praises to God.  It will fill your heart with joy and help you to focus on who God is (and not on the effects of the virus).

“When we thank, praise & worship God, we prime our circuits for high intellectual function, & every cell in our body is positively affected.” Dr. Caroline Leaf

5) Talk with life-giving friends.

If you’re beginning to despair, contact a relative or friend with whom you will be able to speak and pray.  Undeniably, it’s normal to feel saddened by what is happening and that’s why we need to rely on one another.  

Also, don’t wait for someone to reach out to you and please resist having a no-one-cares-for-me pity party.  Remember that everyone is trying to adjust to this new normal and you may not be at the front of their minds.  Nevertheless, they will probably be happy to talk and pray for you. 

At the same time, you also need to encourage yourself in the Lord, so that you can give life-giving hope to others!

6) Do not worry but pray.

Whenever you feel like worrying, bow your head in prayer instead.  Worrying will solve nothing and only give you backache, a headache and diarrhea!  On the other hand, God has all the power and resources to work on your behalf.

“… do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7 ESV

7) Correct poor theology about trials and suffering.

Why do some Christians believe that we will have no trials here on earth?  It is clearly stated in the Bible that in this world, trials are to be expected.  

“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” James 1:2-4 ESV

However, God has a purpose for every trial He allows.  Essentially, trials are meant to mature us, and not destroy us.  The way you respond to trials show you what you truly believe about God.  Is He in control? Is He still good when you suffer?  Will you still trust in Him? Is His grace sufficient for you?

8) Limit news intake to once or twice a day.

If you listen to every news update, you’ll most likely feel increasingly burdened and depressed.  That will not help you to have joy. 

It is important that you know what is happening, but you don’t need to know every covid-19 statistic, heartbreaking stories of losing loved ones, exhausted health care facilities, lack of ventilators, country comparisons, death tolls, rates of infection, conspiracy theories and the list goes on.

You just need to know enough to pray and prepare.  Block out the rest!  

Related articles 

Summary

As a Christian, you can have joy regardless of the circumstances of your life.  More than having a positive attitude, it comes from having a deep intimate relationship with Jesus Christ.  This is my prayer for you:

“The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace.” Numbers 6:24-26 ESV

What other tips are helping you to have joy right now?  What did you do in the past to keep your joy when you were faced with challenging situations? Please comment below.

Get your free “100 Things to be Thankful for” list today to help you be thankful to God.  He remains good!  

When you subscribe to “Petals Bloom”, you’ll receive helpful weekly email tips because I would love to help you grow in your relationships with God and others.  Feel free to email me to let me know how you are doing and in what ways I can pray for you.  

Also, join me on Facebook @PetalsBloomBlog for my weekly live events on Thursdays at 8pm (Atlantic Standard Time).  Thanks for stopping by!

#madeforlove

Like, share & subscribe!

With love,

Kimberly Garth

“Petals Bloom is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.”

Recommended Books:

“Man’s Search for Meaning” by Viktor E. Frankl

“Think, Learn, Succeed: Understanding and Using Your Mind to Thrive at School, the Workplace and Life” by Dr. Caroline Leaf

The post How to Have Joy in the Midst of This Crisis | 8 Simple Tips appeared first on Petals Bloom.

You’re realizing that you’re with the wrong guy.  You know that you should end the relationship but you can’t imagine a future without him.  How do you even separate your intertwined lives? You honestly thought that he was the one that you were going to marry.

Unfortunately, heartbreak is an unavoidable evil of this life. We all make unwise decisions that will inevitably affect many others. Ending a relationship is very difficult, but it’s important to do it as soon as possible if you already know that he’s not the one for you. You can check out ‘6 Guys to Resist’ and ‘5 Truths Why You’re Still Single’. Here are some of the benefits for ending it now:

1. You’ll be able to move on quicker. You are wasting time (his and yours) when you continue to invest in a relationship that needs to end. Time is the most precious resource that we all have. Once time is gone, we can never get it back.
2. Both you and him can begin to heal before you both get ready for your future mates. Healing requires time and it cannot be rushed. Sometimes, it can take years to even realize the damage that has been done. After over 10 years of my first failed relationship, I realised that I had some serious rejection issues. Yes, it took me that long!
3. You can begin to work on the issues that contributed to your poor decisions. You need to discover your weaknesses and flaws and actively work on becoming a healthier person. If you don’t, it is quite likely that you’ll repeat the same mistakes in the future.
4. You will be making room for your future husband. You never know…he might actually be observing you right now.

I was in a relationship with a guy (‘Charlie’) for over 5 years that needed to end. I couldn’t imagine life without him. ‘Charlie’ was a good guy, but there were some aspects of the relationship that were not healthy at all. Deep down, I knew that it needed to end, but I didn’t want to end it. I remember talking with one of my friends who was seeing all the mess. He was advising me to open my eyes and put an end to the ‘madness’. I said to him, ‘you don’t think that God can change him?’ Ladies, we cannot be in love with the future version of a man.  Who knows when the change might come?! It might be when he’s on his last breath after 50 years of a stressful marriage! You don’t want to spend your whole married life in mourning and praying for your husband to change. We know that no one is perfect, but choose your battles very carefully (read ‘6 Guys to Resist’).

“There are many people who will stay in negative situations because it is familiar, rather than go where there is promise of something good, because that would be something unfamiliar” 
― Stormie Omartian, Lead Me, Holy Spirit: Longing to Hear the Voice of God

I have learned some important lessons when ‘Charlie’ and I broke up. If there was one thing we did well, it was that we ended the relationship well. Here are some tips that can help you as you end your relationship:

1) Pray

Although we see men as tough and strong, they have hearts that can hurt just like ours. If you know that you’re going to break up with him, pray that:

1. God will help him to deal with the breakup healthily.
2. God will heal his heart.
3. He may run to God to fill the void in his life.
4. God will help him to change in the ways that are unhealthy.

You can pray along similar lines for yourself. It’s always good to invite the prayers of other believers during this time. ‘The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective’ (James 5:16b).

2) Be direct

When you’re dealing with someone’s heart, it’s best not to ‘beat around the bush’.  You owe it to him to be as tactful as you can in expressing your desire to end it.  At that point in time, I wouldn’t recommend making any promises that there might be a possible re-establishment of the relationship in the future. You don’t know the future. As you develop, you will become a different person and if he remains unchanged, you may not be interested. Please note that if you’re in a very abusive relationship, you’ll need to take great precautionary measures when informing him of the break-up.

3) Set boundaries

When ‘Charlie’ and I entered our relationship, ‘Charlie’ said that if we were to ever break-up, we should have no contact for at least 6 months. I willingly agreed although I didn’t think we would ever break-up! This was one of the best and wisest decisions that we made. You often hear about couples who are ‘on again and off again’ repeatedly for years. That pattern happens because they continue to operate like they are in a relationship with each other. They see, call and message each other regularly. This type of behavior is emotionally draining to say the least.

Additionally, you might be the person who is certain that you don’t want to be with the other person. ‘Charlie’ might be hoping that one day, you’ll come back to him. When you remain in constant contact with your ‘Charlie’, you are not helping him to move on. He will remain hopeful that a ‘re-uniting’ is imminent. Later, when he hears that you’ve found the ‘love of your life’, he’ll be more devastated and heart-broken. Love him enough by helping him to move on as quickly as possible. Cut the communication channels for an extended time. This may sound harsh, but sometimes we need to take drastic measures to protect ourselves and others. How much time would you allow for no communication? After the time has elapsed, you can decide how much communicating you will do with him. If the relationship was highly abusive, you may want to stay away indefinitely.

4) Develop your relationship with God

During this difficult season, you want to focus more time in your relationship with God. The break-up will leave a void in your life and growing intimacy with Jesus is the best void-filler. You need His healing and deliverance. You’ll need His truth to uncover the issues that you must address. You’ll need His grace to go through this rough, trying period. You’ll need his wisdom and direction to take corrective action. You’ll need His strength to go through the difficult, stretching but needed growing pains. You simply need God! The process of growth is not easy but it’s necessary. Don’t take shortcuts:) An excellent resource that I’ve read is ‘Changes that Heal: Four Practical Steps to a Happier, Healthier You’’ by Henry Cloud.

5) Surround yourself with family and friends

We are created for relationship. Oftentimes, God uses other humans in our healing process. You need your family and friends more than ever. Also, ask God for healthy female friends. My closest friends are female and it would be difficult to journey through life without them. Not all female friends are created equal so pray about it and proceed with faith and not fear in working on those relationships.

6) Work on developing you

After the break-up, you will have more time on your hands. Start dreaming again about the ‘new and improved’ you. What hobbies would you like to start? Which places would you like to visit? What new skill would you like to nurture? Exciting times are ahead for you!

As time passes, your heart will heal and the sting of the loss will become less and less. You’ll be glad that you took courage and ended the relationship sooner rather than later. During the initial extended time apart from him, work on yourself, your relationship with God and others. In the midst of the crying, you’ll also learn to laugh as you let God and others into your pain. My encouragement to you is to let go of fear and take steps of faith to end it now.

“Fear is the currency of oppression.” By Danielle Strickland

Journaling is a good practice when you end a relationship. It will help you to be aware of your emotions and let it all out on paper. Bottling up toxic emotions can never be healthy.  You’ll find that journaling will be therapeutic for you and assist you in coming to terms with all that’s happening. Read ‘10 Quick and Easy Tips to Start Journaling TODAY’. Join my 21-day journal challenge and get your FREE journal printable to start today.

What are some tips that you’ve found helpful in ending a relationship? I’d love to hear about your break-up experiences and the lessons that you’ve learnt. Please feel free to comment below. Your comment might be helpful to another woman. You can also share your fears about breaking up. I want to be there for you in your journey. Subscribe and get your FREE ‘Know Yourself’ questionnaire. You will also receive my weekly email tips and be able communicate with me directly.

Subscribe, share and comment!

With love,

Kimberly

Recommended Books:

‘Beating the Break-up Habit’ by Dick Purcell

‘Changes That Heal: Four Practical Steps to a Happier, Healthier You’’ by Henry Cloud

‘Changes That Heal Workwork: Four Practical Steps to a Happier, Healthier You’ by Henry Cloud

‘Lead me, Holy Spirit, Longing to Hear the Voice of God’ by Stormie Omartian

“Petals Bloom is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.”

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