“Tom” has shown keen interest in “Patricia” and the feeling is mutual. However, she has had several suitors in the past but all have ended with disappointment. Can “Patricia” win the heart of a godly man like “Tom”?
If you plan to engage the heart of a man, you need to understand how he thinks and what he really needs. In the heart of every man lies a desire to be respected and admired. This calls for a serious re-training of the average woman, even a Christian woman.
Here are 5 secrets a woman needs to know to win the heart of a godly man:
1) Accept him as he is.
A godly man knows that he is not perfect. Yet, he longs for a woman who will love and accept him as he is. Learning to love a man unconditionally is the only way to build a lasting relationship with him. As such, you have to learn to accept the good and the not-so-good.
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Without a doubt, he does not want to be your renovation project. As a matter of fact, if you realise that he has certain inclinations which aggravate you to your core, you’re better off leaving him alone.
2) Appreciate him.
In order to do this effectively, you need to make an effort to know him. Ask him open-ended questions to encourage him to talk about himself. Additionally, observe his interactions with others and how he handles life on a whole.
Like a good detective, you cannot leave all the observing to yourself. Ask your mutual friends about him.
Find a way to tactfully communicate to him your appreciation of his character and uniqueness. When the romance was budding between my husband and me, I noticed that my husband had a special knack for lyrics (afterall, he is a rapper!). I’d tell him (with a glowing smile) that he was a lyrical genius. A smile would light up his face whenever I showered him with compliments.
Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body. Proverbs 16:24 ESV
A man who is interested in you will display small acts of kindness toward you like opening the door for you; calling to find out how you’re doing; offering you a ride home and the like. Don’t take those acts for granted but rather smile and say “thank you”.
3) Admire his masculinity.
It’s all well and good to admire his character and uniqueness as a fellow human being (point two). However, a masculine man longs to be admired for his manly qualities by a woman he adores.
Most men today experience a desert in this area. They have become so used to being belittled by those around them, from boyhood to manhood. Furthermore, our current culture propagates that women should “cut men down to size” by magnifying their shortcomings and withholding our compliments. Only foolish women will fall for that mindset.
Therefore, when a woman enters into his life and speaks this love language of encouraging words, he will most likely want her to become an integral part of his life.
If you want to win the heart of a godly man, you need to cultivate the habit of using your words to build him up continually.
There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. Proverbs 12:18 ESV
I made a conscious effort to be generous with my words of affirmation toward the last two men who pursued me. Both wanted to marry me, but I married the last one. It was a good choice!
Be sincere and specific. You cannot just say, “Tom, I really admire you.” Instead, you can say, “Tom, I admire your dedication to working hard in order to earn a living. You’re such a responsible man. The world would be a better place if there were more men like you around.”
Tip: Start practicing this with the men in your lives like your father and brother(s). Watch how your words will impact them.
4) Support him in his dreams.
Every man needs a cheerleader in his wife-to-be. In the movie “The Founder”, Ray Kroc’s wife was portrayed as unsupportive and critical of his dreams. Unfortunately, another woman arrived on the scene with whom he could have shared his glorious dreams for McDonald’s global expansion. He later divorced his wife and married her.
I’m definitely not supporting this turn of events but it just goes to show the critical importance of a woman’s support in a man’s life.
Therefore, if you want to win his heart, he needs to be assured of your unwavering support of his goals and dreams. If you cannot support him, it’ll be better to leave him alone because eventually he will sense it.
5) Feed him.
There’s a tremendous truth to the old adage, “the way to a man’s heart is through this stomach.” Even if a man is a great cook himself, he would appreciate it if his wife-to-be can provide a wholesome meal for him and their children. When a woman cooks (or bakes) for a man, he feels cared for.
True story
Recently, I told my husband that I wanted to bake a chocolate cake to show my appreciation for a gentleman who was kind to us. However, my husband felt that the gesture of a cake would give the wrong impression or even evoke feelings of tenderness toward me. If the man was elderly, he would not have minded. That is the power of cooking on a man, dear ladies! Wield that power! haha
If you want to win the heart of the right man, cook or bake something delicious for him from time to time. He wouldn’t want to give you up!
For those who are challenged in this area, enroll in a cooking course; ask a friend or relative to teach you; or subscribe to a YouTube cooking channel. There is no shortage of teaching! I’ve noticed that it’s more of an attitude change that’s needed among women today. Any woman can learn to cook or bake sufficiently good if she is willing to learn.
Summary
Although you may not stoop to the level of belittling the man in your life, you might simply choose to be silent. Since he cannot read your mind, it’s important that you learn to express your acceptance, appreciation, admiration and support of him.
Top that with some home-cooked meals or home-baked goods and he’ll have a hard time resisting his desire to spend the rest of his earthly life with you. Don’t forget that your feminine nature will also be shining through! Check out “6 Practical Tweaks to Get A Man’s Attention.” If you want to win the heart of a godly woman, you also need to be a woman worthy of pursuit.
To recap, here are 5 secrets a woman needs to know to win the heart of a godly man:
- Accept him as he is.
- Appreciate him.
- Admire his masculinity.
- Support him in his dreams.
- Feed him.
What has been your experience with men? What makes a man want to give up his freedom as a single man to marry a woman? Please comment below because I would love to hear your views!
Thanks for stopping by!
#madeforlove
With love,
Kimberly Garth
Disclosure
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Recommended Books:
“Love and Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs” by Emerson Eggerichs
Another awesome post. I am learning and being reinforced continually. This blog has truly been a tremendous blessing to me!
Nikida, as always, you encourage me as well!:)
I’m writing all these tips down! Thank you 😁
Lol and you can pin on Pinterest!:)
“Recently, I told my husband that I wanted to bake a chocolate cake to show my appreciation for a gentleman who was kind to us. However, my husband felt that the gesture of a cake would give the wrong impression or even evoke feelings of tenderness toward me. If the man was elderly, he would not have minded. That is the power of cooking on a man, dear ladies!” This reminded me of something that happened to me about 4 to 5 years ago. I wish I read this before that. I decided out of thankfulness to cook for a man and his family. He started to develop feelings and the relationship was shattered, because I didn’t feel the same way. Horrible. Now that I’m reading this, I believe it to be sooo true! Only gonna be cooking for my future husband and family, lol. Thank you so much Kimberly, you are a gem!
Wow Merrill! We have to be careful to whom we bestow gifts of food! If a relationship with a man is truly like a brother-sister type, then food might not awaken any romance. When I come to your country, I’ll have to arrange for some cooking lessons from you! lol